My sister made the same faces in her sleep ... I loved it.

I'm very sad for you.  And I can feel the anger that you have.  I have the same anger.  My sister was taken after only ten months...She was also 42.  Her kids were 15 and 13.  16 months later I have the same anger.  It's not getting any easier.  My sister and I were not twins...we were 18 months apart.  But she was my very best friend and I am lost without her.


(26 replies, posted in In Remembrance)

Jeff was one of the first people to talk to me on here.  I was so inspired by his positive attitude and just prayed that my sister had the same.  Unfortunately she did not .  We tried so hard to help her feel that way.  I was also just shocked he was from Kansas as I we are too.  I just felt a connection.  I used his story to inspire my sister.  He passed after my sister.  I was glad I did not have to tell her that he had been taken by that cancer.  I have a deep sadness for all of the members of this board who has lost someone or has been taken by this monstrous disease.  I will be checking this board until the day I go to be with Shirley.  Thank you all for your posts and friendship.



(11 replies, posted in General Discussion)

I could not agree more!!!!  There has to be a way to get the word out to more people and that is why I wear my bracelet every day.  Great idea!  I might even put in my obituary that my sister passed previous to me of bile duct cancer.


(28 replies, posted in Announcements)

I have had over 40 friends and family join.  It's awesome.


(7 replies, posted in In Remembrance)

I am so sorry.  I am so sad for you.  She must have been strong.  She made it as long as my 42 year old sister.  Know that we are all praying for you.


(11 replies, posted in Introductions!)

What is amazing is how much you still need this website and how much it still helps even after our loved ones are gone.

What Stage is she in?  And what doctor did she see at K.U. Med?  That's where my sister started out as well.

That number does not need to be in the thousands.  My sister's never got above 125.  And she was stage 4 with metastesis.  They tell you that you should not pay attention to that number...but it's there for a reason.

You do feel helpless in the beginning.  It's such a shock and you just go into panic mode.  You will calm down and then you will just start doing whatever you can to help your sister.  Regardless of the outcome.  My sister was 42 and she survived 10 months after being diagnosed.  She also had two children.  You will make it.  You will be there for her.

We were told about the three's also.  Shirley didn't eat or drink for 14 days until she finally passed.  And the morning she did pass...her bag was completely full of urine.  She also had perfect vitals and very warm hands.  She fought until the end...


(17 replies, posted in Introductions!)

You were awesome to be there for your mom.   God puts us here to take care of the ones we love when they get sick.  We have to help them die.  It's so sad.  I am sad for you.  It's not going to be easy but if you just know in your heart how good you are for helping will help you.  smile


(6 replies, posted in In Remembrance)

I can feel your pain.  My sister's cancer was the first to enter our family.  It took her in 10 months.  She was 42.  She has a 16 and 14 year old.  She is also a sister to 5 and an ex-wife and was married at the time she passed. 

It's devastating.  It has been 11 months since she passed.  It is not one bit easier.  But you find a way to manage.  I cried on my way to work today.  I stayed with her for 9 days and nights until she passed right before my eyes. 

Your heart is broken...but the kids will heal you a little.  My sister's kids are a constant reminder of her every time I look at them.  That's why God gave us them.  To keep her alive.  Take care of yourself.


(13 replies, posted in Grief Management)

Wow Sarah!  That is identical to what I went through and what my sister went through.  From being diagnosed to dying within a year.  The suffering.  I was by her side every single day and night until the end.  And my family is still grieving terribly.  We are a very close family and it was our first loss.  She suffered throughout the entire time and she was so scared to die. 

I'm so sorry you are so sad.  Before my sister got sick and died...I could never relate to anyone who had lost someone they loved.  Unfortunately I can now.  I can physically feel your pain and I am so sad for you.

I am sad for all of us:(


My sister was diagnosed in March 2008 Stage IV with mets to liver and bones.  She responded at first to chemo with tumors shrinking and a few disappeared.  By October they had stopped responding and did not respond to the new chemo.  She died in January 2009.  She survived 10 months.  And they called her chemo palliative from the beginning.


(27 replies, posted in General Discussion)

No reason to sugar coat it...not for the patient or the caregiver.  When my sister got diagnosed...the first thing I did was get on the computer for research.  This is one of the first websites I went to and ... was a slap in the face to hear how bad this cancer really is.  But it also got my attention that you have to fight with everything you have from the first second you are diagnosed.  I think calling it what it is makes you fight even harder.  It has taken the people we love the most away from us so there are no other words for it than horrific, horrendous, awful, beast...whatever.  Actually I have a few words for it..but they would not be allowed on here.

I'm sorry you are having a difficult time reading this.  My sister could not have read anything on this website.  It would have hurt her too much.  So I did it for her.  Sometimes that's best.


(5 replies, posted in General Discussion)

Hi Julia...I'm doing o.k.  Bad time of year.  This is the time when my sister really went downhill last year.  I'm trying to stay positive and happy like she would have wanted me to.  Thanks for checking in on me.  I'm checking this website every day...

I have submitted myself to volunteer for anything that I can.  I would love to do something in memory of my sister.

Wow Jane...I felt like I was reading something I would have written when I read yours.  My sister was 42 with 2 children.  And I felt exactly what you just described.

I went through the same thing with my sister 10 months ago.  You will find strength and wisdom you never knew you had.  I will pray for your family.


(64 replies, posted in Introductions!)

tomf you should start a blog.  It's very interesting reading about your experience.

I come here numerous times every day checking in on everyone and my sister has been gone 9 months:(


(16 replies, posted in General Discussion)

It's so good to hear you are out of the hospital.  Just keep getting better:)

I voted for January...the month this disease took my sister from me.


(16 replies, posted in General Discussion)

I just read that Lisa Rockstad is not doing well.  Her daughter posted on her blog that she is in the hospital.   I do not know her, but I read about her.  Let's keep her in our prayers.