Giovanni,

Lauren is very lucky to have you in her life, her mom said you are a barber and you even cut her hair and I find that so sweet. And you two are so young to have already been together for 7 years! Young love is a splendid thing!

Patty

2

(18 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Dave,

First, welcome to the best little discussion board. Second, I think it was pretty cruddy of the doctor to give you 6-9 months, I think you should ask him if he can see the winning lotto numbers in his crystal ball. We have many people on this board who were told the same and they are still here and kicking so take what he said with a grain of salt.

It's great you are on the trial, we will all be hoping and praying for you on your path to a brand new (well, actually, I guess a used model) liver!

Patty

3

(4 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Welcome to our little corner of the world, you will find a wealth of information here and the nicest people. It's great that your mom is feeling good, keep us posted and ask questions if you have doubts or need information.

Patty

4

(27 replies, posted in General Discussion)

Chicago is praying! Patty

Sandy,

Thanks for your efforts to raise awareness. It was very kind of you to reach out to your old classmate, you provide her with comfort only you can give, you really know what she is going through in terms of grief and what she will confront in the years ahead as she navigates life without her husband. It will not be easy but she will not be alone.

Patty

6

(108 replies, posted in General Discussion)

Tom,

I hope you are able to make the trip tomorrow to MDA, I think two heads are better than one, maybe they will have a different take on things. Caregiving is a full-time gig so just keep us posted when you can, I take a mental relaxation break every time you mention boats passing on a canal, it must be a lovely sight.

Patty

7

(48 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Eli,

Thanks for sharing your great and good news. The hernias are unfortunate and an annoying complication but at least it is something they can just watch.

Having made the rounds to many different doctors with my mom I would have appreciated more humor but I can see where my mom might not have, even though she was a hilarious lady it was her body that was the punchline.

Patty

8

(11 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Tiffany,

Welcome to our little family, I am sorry you have had occasion to find us but I have looked at your FB page and I can see you have an army of angels on your side and now you have us, too.

May I ask how your cc was discovered? Did you have symptoms or was it by accident?

Patty

9

(2 replies, posted in Members' Cafe)

Thanks for posting this, it is a good article, what she says is very true.

Patty

Joann,

I am so sorry for your loss and your children's loss, this cancer takes so many good people from their families. "What would Dave do" is a great legacy to leave behind, to have provided an example of what is the right thing to do, that is something your children will always have as a compass to live by.

Please do visit when you need support, we all need each other.

Patty

11

(14 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Kathy,

Well, once again a post on this board has turned me into a big ball of mush. Your dad sounds like a gem and those kids really are very lucky, what a great role model Mr. Jim is, especially for the boys, of how to be a good person.

Some people never find out what they meant to others so it is nice your dad can appreciate this honor. I had an uncle who died very suddenly and at the wake we were very surprised by how affected his coworkers were, I wonder if when he was alive he realized how they felt about him. What a gift they have given your dad, to know that he matters to so many people.

Patty

12

(12 replies, posted in General Discussion)

BB,

I am so sorry she is gone. It is hard for a 15 year-old girl to be without her mother. Your daughter has learned at a young age that life is precious and not to be taken for granted but this lesson has come at great cost.

Poetry has comforted me greatly. I am no poetess like our Lainy but here is one for Susan by one of my favorites:

                        Dream Land

              Where sunless rivers weep
              Their waves into the deep,
              She sleeps a charmed sleep:
                     Awake her not.
              Led by a single star,
              She came from very far
              To seek where shadows are
                     Her pleasant lot.

              She left the rosy morn,
              She left the fields of corn,
              For twilight cold and lorn
                     And water springs.
              Through sleep, as through a veil,
              She sees the sky look pale,
              And hears the nightingale
                    That sadly sings.

              Rest, rest, a perfect rest
              Shed over brow and breast;
              Her face is toward the west,
                    The purple land.
              She cannot see the grain
              Ripening on hill and plain;
              She cannot feel the rain
                    Upon her hand.

              Rest, rest, for evermore
              Upon a mossy shore;
              Rest, rest at the heart's core
                   Till time shall cease:
              Sleep that no pain shall wake;
              Night that no morn shall break
              Till joy shall overtake
                   Her perfect peace.

                                      ~Christina Rossetti (1830-1894)

Take care of yourself, I pray for you and your daughter.

Patty

안녕 = An nyoung = hello, informal in Korean

What is your mom's current condition? Is she mobile? Does she feel well enough to leave the house? If so I would ask her if she would like to go places--concerts, museums, movies, gardens, etc. Is she well enough to travel? If so ask her if there is somewhere she has always wanted to visit.

Does she have other relatives and friends? If so make arrangements for outings or visits. Older people in the U.S. can become socially isolated if they can't drive, if that is the case with her she may want to see relatives and friends she has not seen in a while.

Patty

Rob,

I can't imagine a greater test of a relationship than supporting a partner through an illness such as this. Many people take a vow but not all are able to keep it. Your wife is indeed lucky to have you by her side and your daughter as well.

It is difficult to watch a loved one suffer. When we bear witness to suffering we truly begin to comprehend what it is to feel compassion and to love deeply. I pray for your wife, that she may know peace.

Patty

15

(20 replies, posted in Members' Cafe)

Lainy,

Ok, I think we are the only cancer support group with a poet laureate. But then, we are one extra special cancer support group and all the other groups only wish they could be like us!

Patty

Margaret,

Well, that is a very inconvenient blood clot, it must have been hard to go to a hospital after spending so much time there these past years. The shots don't sound too fun either but they will mend you.

Marion,

A truly lovely reposting, that is the first chapter of the book you are going to write, it is pure poetry.

Patty

17

(3 replies, posted in New Developments)

There are unfortunately lots of new people on the board and people have been asking about alternative treatments so I thought I would resurrect this thread. I did another search and found this page, not sure how current it is, the explanation is good but the links toward the end do not work:

http://www.acsu.buffalo.edu/~andersh/re … cancer.asp

Also found this, older article but I don't remember finding this one when I searched before:

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/OnCall/Story? … amp;page=1

Patty

Your father's story really is very compelling, modern medicine doesn't have all the answers and your father was very brave to go his own way and stare this in the face.

More prayers, coming right up.

Patty

19

(27 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Kathy,

It is one thing to disagree on funeral arrangements when someone's wishes are not known. Tell your sister when she dies she can make the decisions! Or maybe your father can put her in her place!

The road ahead is a difficult one, I pray he gets his wish to pass quickly.

Patty

20

(48 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Eli,

We are kind of VENTING CENTRAL here so let loose when you feel things getting to you, the empathy here is endless.

You sound formidable, your wife is lucky to have you as an ally. I think the briefcase is good, makes you look like you did your homework, you mean business, and you will be taking names. Your wife could get a t-shirt that says "I'm with the crazy husband" and an arrow pointing to you. That will deflect any hostility away from her, kind of like good cop, bad cop.

I am the resident librarian so I also recommend books, this one looks good:

When a parent has cancer : a guide to caring for your children
Author:     Wendy Schlessel Harpham; Jonas Kulikauskas

http://www.worldcat.org/oclc/55000381

Patty

Glenys,

Welcome aboard, it sounds like you have had a fairly good quality of life for the 3 years and that is something to be grateful for and your attitude will certainly help you face whatever is to come.

You might consider posting your holistic methods in the Alternative Treatments section of the board.

Patty

22

(14 replies, posted in General Discussion)

Karen,

I am sorry, I just saw your follow up question to my post about PDT. I also e-mailed you just in case you don't see this reply.

My mother did not have PDT, I was not aware of it before she had the surgery, I am fuzzy on the details because it has been a few years but I think after her surgery I made a call to Cancer Treatment Center in Zion, IL, and they did not do PDT for cc at that time at that facility, though that may have changed.

Gavin's father had PDT, if you search the board you will see he has posted quite a bit on his father's experience.

Patty

23

(9 replies, posted in In Remembrance)

I end up crying a lot when I come here and after reading his Facebook posts I am a sobbing mess. He seems like a person who really understood what life was all about from the beginning and from the photos it is clear he lived life to its fullest. The definition he gives of his name is heartbreaking and his posts reveal the clarity he had that cc made even clearer: All is now. Now is all. What he says about women is also very touching, how lucky his wife and daughters were to have him in their lives, I am so sorry they have lost him.

Patty

Grover and Cindy,

I think you two have a future in tag team wrestling, you need to come up with some good names!

Patty

Helen,

I was invaded by family for Thanksgiving and then sick for 3 days so I missed this as well, thanks for your lovely wishes from the other side of the pond.

Patty