Melinda, what WONDERFUL news!!
I´ve been trying to read up on you and get almost breathless... We didn´t do the same treatments even though I´ve done a lot of GemCis as well. I never was resected. BUT apart from that you are one of the few ones I can feel that we have the same disease. I´m even an RN (paramedic, at work right now) just turned 46 diagnosed in April-2010. Still asymptomatic of any signs of cancerous disease (if you don´t look at scans smile That little detail)
Please contact me if you feel like it!

hugs
Maria

This is GREAT NEWS!
Wonderful! Happy for you!
Maria

Kris, I will never be "cured" either.
But what does cure mean? Nothing to be seen on scan or living a good life? What's most important? Maybe we have to aim for living and staying health and skip the clean-scan-part?

At least I think that this is possible. It's been possible for me the last 2,5 years.
At my visit to the doctor the other day (stable disease) you could really start wondering who was sick/healthy... Comparing me, the nurse and my doctor I don't think anybody would have guessed I was the one with the bad diagnosis.

What is health, what is disease, what is CANCER? Words trying to describe something, but life is much bigger than that. Much more complicated and not so black and white. Typically humans wanting to put everything in nice little boxes, classified and easy to understand.

Here's to us and to a nice day above earth smile ( November in Sweden.... dark, rain, cold...well, let's give ita try wink )

Maria

YES Kris!!!! Happy for you!!
Maria

5

(8 replies, posted in Thought for the Day)

Thank you darlings smile You are my heroes!!

6

(8 replies, posted in Thought for the Day)

I am grateful for my wonderful life.
For my son who is a blessing, everyday.
So many wonderful friends, old ones and new ones.
For feeling strong and healthy four days after chemo.
For being able to work, travel and run, the things I love the most.
For all the things this cancer has taught me.
For being able to NOT hate this cancer, because it is a part of me.
Peace and love!
Maria

Ohhh, this is so beautiful!
Mark, never ever accept this disease to take anything from you, just stay on track and don´t let it.
Maria

I'm SO happy for you, and for all of us! This is so wonderful.
Maria

Thank you Peggy smile !

My lifestile includes
*Physical excersise, a lot and hard
*Yoga and reiki healing
*Food: Organic mostly vegetarian, no gluten, no lactose, no sugar
*Complementary medicin with a lot of diferent herbs
*A very positive attitude, keeping a "normal life" and not seeing myself as sick.

Maria

10

(10 replies, posted in Good News / What's Working)

We NEED stories like this! Thank you so much for sharing!
Another proof that palliative is just a word invented to try to put us in boxes, and we DO NOT belong in boxes!! Life is not black or white.
<3
Maria

30 months now, still healthy and strong, still shrinking tumors after 37 rounds of chemo.
Still cancer without disease.
//Maria

WOW so happy for you both!!
Shrinkage is wonderful!! Doesn´t matter if it´s a little or a huge - it´s proof the tumors are dying!!!!!
Love to both of you!
Maria

13

(23 replies, posted in Good News / What's Working)

Thank you guys smile
Percy, we're both very very tough wink

Yes sometimes I just get so tired of this cancerstory that I just decide to forget about it. Just live and never ever think about it again.

Gavin, he wasn't, hahaha, how could he deny this poor sick woman such a wish... He will regret it a couple of times during training I'm sure...

Thanks Kris, I'm impressed myself smile

I'm on for the cruise! Whenever!

So very happy to be posting in this section smile!!
Finally met my doc yesterday to get the results from my MRI done almost two weeks ago.
After 6 rounds of GemCis there was shrinkage, my big tumor had gone from 4,7 cm to 4,1 cm.
He told me he never saw someone like me as he'd been so sure this time there would be no shrinkage, but growth. This because of the growth after the embolization I did in April.
This proves my theories works though... After this last embo I was in such a pain and with high fever for a week, my liverenzyms were high as well. As I'm quite experienced with embos (my 6th) and never was this sick, I was so sure the chemo didn't stay in the tumor but damaged the healthy livertissue. They used smaller beads this time.

Both me and the doctor are quite sure though the shrinkage isn't only due to the GemCis but also the way I live and all the other things I do.

I can't express how happy and grateful I am!!! It would have been so strange with growing tumors when I feel this well!
So now this mini-vacation from chemo is over and I will give it another chance!

Love and hope to EVERYBODY <3

Ps I told my doctor I think he and I should run Stockholm marathon next June, and he simply did a high five smile He IS a runner, but never did a marathon. NOTHING is going to stop me from that!!!!!!!

15

(15 replies, posted in Good News / What's Working)

Wonderful news!! You will be just fine!
//Maria

Hello Liliana!
I would like to welcome you as well. I'm not so far away, i the south part. Of Sweden.
I was diagnosed 2 years and 5 months ago, almost like your husband!
I've been on gemox, gemsar xeloda and gemcis, 6 chemoembolizations and I feel fine. I have a lot of tumors in my liver, they hav shrunk and they have grown some also, but most important, I feel just fine!

It's easy to say don't be scared, it doesn't help anyone, but sometimes you do get scared anyway. It's ok. Life is scary sometimes!
Hoping for the best for your husband and you, he seems very strong!!!
Love
Maria

OF COURSE you have to post this here - this is GREAT!!!! It's working! A dead tumor is a good tumor!!

18

(23 replies, posted in Chemotherapy)

LIKE you're being in charge!!!!
Hugs
Maria

Goodgoodgood!!!!! Happy for you <3
Maria

20

(4 replies, posted in General Discussion)

Thank you Eli and Lainy!!!! Did my MRI this morning, and now the results have to go through a bunch of doctors before it reaches me... That's how it works here.
Again, thank you so much for support!!
<3
Maria

I feel like in a crossroad at the moment..... If anyone has any thougths I would appreciate it.

This past tuesday I was supposed to have my 38th round of iv chemo, and my 7th GemCis since the 6 month break I had Jan-June.
I had to start chemo again since my silent tumors had started growing again after a chemoembolization that didn't do any good.
When I took this break (after 18 months on chemo) it was after listening to my very strong inner voice telling me I needed it. I was doing good really, but having this feeling it was harming me.
Looking back this was a good decision, but having the embo wasn't.

So now after 6 rounds of chemo I just couldn't take another one... My white bloodcount hasn't recovered well lately, I suppose my bonemarrow is getting tired. This is the only objective sign. The rest is a feeling.
I couldn't sleep two nights before going to the hospital for the chemo, didn't now why. Then the day before I was just crying the whole day, and it came to my mind that I didn't want the chemo. I just felt NOOOOO.
I went there anyway, and my WBC was exactly enough for chemo. But when the nurse was about to connect it, I just couldn't do it. Started to cry just by seeing it. And I'm NOT someone crying a lot.
So I went home. Feeling better and better these last days, happy again, singing.
Now on Monday it's time for MRI, and then doctor's appointment.
But, they always leave it so much up to me to decide. Because they don't have any good ideas at this point. This is Sweden, so there's no insurence-problem whith treatments.
I just don't now what to do. There are no other hospitals or doctors I can go to, this country is very small, we only hace 300 cases of CC/year.
I know I now have to wait for results and to speak to the doctor, but it is so hard to know what to do at this point. I know you can't go on with chemo forever, then chemo will kill you in the end, at least GemCis.

Thanks for listening!

22

(17 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Joanna, this sounds really good! You're going to make this.
I found out the same way you did, felt a hard mass in my abdomen. 10 cm tumor but also 10 small ones spread all over, therefore no surgery.
This was april-2010. I was 43 then.
Since that I've had 37 rounds of chemo, gemOx, Gemzar+Xeloda and GemCis. I also did 6 chemoembolizations.
I still work and live a normal life. Ran marathon now this june, andtwo halfmarathons these past two years. So I can't say i'm a bit sick really.
The treatments are harsh but I have no signs of cancer (if you don't look at the scans).
I'm SURE that everything is possible, but it is a war where you have to be smart, smarter then cancer.
I have since dx done everything in my power to support my body in this war, so it won't leave space to tumors, and to tolerate the treatments. Mentally, physically, spiritually, food, herbs, in every way possible.
Hugs!
Maria

Tiffany, soooooo happy for you!! You give hope to the rest of us also!!! You enjoy these good things happening to you, and I'm sure it's doing good for the rest of us as well!!!! Bless you!
Maria

And here I am crying because I´m so tired of chemo and don´t want to go there tomorrow. For my 38th intravenous session. Sometimes it´s just too much. I´m so unsure if it´s doing me any good. I do know it harms me though, it always does.
I found more ayurvedic herbs that I take, and I sometimes I just want to go with the alternative thing. But I´m not sure.
Take care!!
Maria

25

(11 replies, posted in Good News / What's Working)

YES!!! Wonderful news!
//Maria