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(11 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Dear DCMAC and all of you who have responded. My husdband of 25 years too was "healthy" and bam!  Our diagnosis came in May and we have tried chemo with no luck. More tumors on liver and lungs. Primary cc. I watch him everyday lose more and more of himself, energy not eating. I can't believe this is happening to "us". And yet it happens to many.

Lainy said she was blessed with 16 years more than may have in a life time!  I try to think like that to and start to figure out my new norm. It is just so hard to think of life without my buddy!

I think it is helpful to know what stage your husband was diagnosed origninally. We too have stopped chemo but feeling like "did we give up too soon?".

Margart, sounds like your husband and mine are alike!  Accepting (but fighting) this unreal cancer.  Just five months ago he was well and now.......Peter is fighting for his life.  Chemo not working so healthy living to buy time.   I am trying to not feel sorry for myself but feeling cheated in the prime of our life (61 he and 52 me). We had So many plans.

One of the thing we just had was a Celebration of Life Party for "The Love of Pete".  What a great party and show of love. We are enjoying everyday we have now and hope there will be many.

Thank you for sharing your story. I needed to read something like this tonight.

Pam, I will look into the search engines. My husband and I visited New Bern last fall. I have a cousin who slips a 41 foot Lagoon Cat there. Nice place.

To: For my dad,
Everyone is in such a different place I assume. We too went to U of M and because it is stage four with tumors in liver and lots of spots on lung, they did not have options for us. I would like to think that we are doing what we we can and not missing something. We have stopped chemo due to growth of more tumors on his liver. At a loss! 

To:  Margaret
Thank you for your kind words. We are living the moment. Planning a sailing trip to Chicago in two weeks if he has the energy to do so. We are staying in a lighthouse this weekend for our 25th wedding anniversary, compliments of my board of directors where I work! 

Still a nightmare!

Wilma, how is it going for you and your husband?  We have stopped chem -more tumors appeared on his liver. Met with Hospice yesterday. He is doing ok in fact on our sailboat haing breakfast. He is tired a lot however.  His Celebration of Life Party that we had for him was wonderful. Aver 140 people came out to support him. It was not a benefit just a party!  Wonderful friends and he felt really loved. Like you said what a roller coaster!

Thank you all, it is amazing the number of people on this site!  In regard to a second option yes we went to U of M and what they said is because it is stage  4 and the tumor on his liver and spots all over his lung he will get the same treatment in Muskegon Michigan or Mayo, or John Hopkins, or.......so. 

Pam, I am so sorry to hear about your family at such a young age!  I can't imagine with young children!

Lainey, We are from Muskegon MI.  I guess that since we found Peters at stage four that we do not have the options you two did.  Not sure what a Whipple is ...so new to this stuff.
Planned on sailing to Chicago this summer to see our youngest son, not sure if that will work out.  I am the executive director of a small mon profit but will be able to take some time off.  Just am so lost in the trees!

Oh Tiffany stage four also with young children. You are a few months a head of us. Is the father in the picture. I can't imaging how down my husband is to also be a primary care giver to young children!  I only hope you have a good support system there!

Laing, thank you for your kind words. Wow 5 plus years. All I read is usually 10 months. Can I ask at what stage he was at and where it manifesteded itself?  I would love to think of having that time!

We have two boys ( my step sons -grown), we took family photos this weekend.  at his Celebtation of Life party this weekend (you can come) I hired a vidotographer to interviw friends, family and coworkers so our future gandchildren can met grandpa!  He will also interview Peter ( husband) what are you proud of, what do you wish you had done, etc. 

His "wake" while he is still here!  I can't believe I am talking like that -like he will be gone soon but that is what I read!  true - short from a miracle

What are your two situations?  I assume you both lost you hsbands to this very wild cancer?  How fast?

Thank you, yes have tried all of the above without much sussess. Thinking there is a major obstruction.  Thinking of checking with the oncologist on Tuesday.

Yes bitter sweat party, but a chance to say goodby to friends while he still feels.....fair and looks good.  Just wish I knew what to do for him!

Five months ago we were sailing in the BVI's and three months ago my husband had chest pain, leading us down a path to stage four cholangiocarcinoma,  tumor on his liver and many many spots all over his lungs! 

How does this happen!  He just turned 61 last week.   We have to many plans for many years to come!  Because we have read all the stuff on this very agressive cancer, we are having a Celebration of Life party for him this weekend. 

I am so thrown off by all of this, my world feels like it is spinning out of control.  I need to know what to expect.  His belly is growing, he is having elimination problems, water retention. We have met with a doc from the local Hospice Program about care and gave good advice but dealing with this, seeing him SO uncomfortable I am looking for advice.