(4 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Thanks  Lainy and Pam


(6 replies, posted in In Remembrance)

Hi all
I guess here is where i should be posting this kind of a story, Before my dad got sick whenever we saw a butterfly he would say "oh look mom came to visit", When i was thinking about her one would appear, well dad is gone for 9 months now and when ever I think of him I see a butterfly, The strange thing is a few weeks back we had a service at dad's grave to unveil his footstone, and in the middle of the speech I was making in flies 2 very colorful butterflies, I guess it was mom and dad coming to visit and let me know they are together again, Well with thanksgiving coming I have been thinking what is it going to be like without my dad here, both of my parents are gone and I do miss them so much. I am at work this morning and the office was very warm so i decided to go outside for a bit of fresh air, I thought to myself it would be nice to have a sign from my parents that the holidays will be ok, I looked to the right and there they were 2 colorful butterflies  flying by, it is very strange because it is a very cold and rainy day here, I guess they just wanted to visit with me for a minute.

I hope all that are dealing with cancer and their families can try to enjoy the holidays, and for those who have lost someone, please remember they they are always closein our hearts


(4 replies, posted in Introductions!)

Hi  everyone and thank you for letting me join this site. It was 9 months ago that my dad passed from Cholangiocarcinoma at 79 years old. When dad was diagnosed 5 months prior to his passing I quickly found this site and have been reading ever since. I wanted to know why my dad got this terrible cancer, what could be done and what would happen. I know from the get-go that dads treatment was only going to be palliative. He was so ill when he had his first symptoms and sign that something was wrong, he did try the Chemo route, he had 5 rounds of chemo, but was still not going to get the tumors to shrink, after treatment number 5 Dad's oncologist said to stop the treatments it was doing more harm than good. Dad was home the whole time he was sick, He never wanted to go to a nursing home or a facility and wanted to be in his home, My sister and I promised him that we would take care of him in his home. (Our mother had passed 20 years earlier) so it was up to us to take care of him. My older brother lives out of state and could not be with dad as much as my sister and I could. I guess with the holidays coming, I am having a pitty party for myself and just needed a place to vent. Dad and I were oh so close and in the last few days. I told him it was ok to let go, It was ok for him to go Lindy with mom again. We had Hospice start the week before dad passed, and it was a good experience, the little book they give on the process of dying was pretty much right on. I am glad I had the last 5 months to really talk with dad, when he left i was at peace I had no  unresolved issues , no unanswered questions, and no remose for the time I had with him. Dad and i were very close and he allowed me to be even closer in his last weeks. I miss him so much especially around the holidays, Thanksgiving was one of Dad's favorite. I am making the traditional fest next week and I am sure he will be proud. I will leave a glass of wine on the table in honor of him. Thanks for letting me vent.

I pray for all those who are suffering from this terrible disease, and for those who have passed or have lost someone to cancer. I guess somewhere inside all of us there is something to be tankful for at this time of the year.