Topic: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Dec  21       I was asked out for lunch for the 22nd by a Man on the Senior
                  Dating site. I said yes as he seemed very nice. That night when
                  I went to sleep I felt the pressure of someone leaning against 
                  Me which I have had about 4 times over the last 3 years and I
                  Took it as a sign that Teddy likes this man.

DEC 22        Went to lunch, very nice. On the way home a car came in front
                   Of me and the license plate was ‘olbluyes’ We used to call
                   Teddy that and my car is blue like his eyes. Teddy approved!
                    I called Maria T, sister on the ride home and I was trying to
                    Remember one of our “love” songs from our wedding and I
                   Just went blank! While I was talking with her she couldn’t 
                   think of it either. I loudly said, “Teddy, what was the name
                   of that song” and in a second it appeared in my mind like     
                   someone was singing it to me!  What a Chistmas gift I have
                   received.  The song was “More Than The Greatest Love”.

                   The reason I am posting this is that to all of you who have lost 
                   someone I know the loneliness can be unbearable at times and   
                   there is nothing wrong with finding a companion (I don't want to
                   get married) we clicked but we do have a hang up as he is 50 
                   minutes from me. He is Italian! He is 80 but looks
                   70 and really handsome for 80. He understands what I am going
                   through with the Remicade, his ex was on it. Life becomes so
                   much easier with someone to share things with. We laugh   
                   a lot. Just have to figure out this mileage thing before we run
                   out of mileage! These were the best gifts ever with Teddy's 
                   world and this one! Gavin, he is coming over for my Christmas 
                   Or'dourves tomorrow! SO, now I sit here listening to Il 
                   Divo sing T. theme song, "I DiD it My Way" and soaking a dish 
                   towel. Love you all and PLEASE have a glorious Holiday.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Good for you Lainey!!! I've been chatting with a local fellow that I haven't actually met in person yet. He was telling me that he had only dated one widow before and that her house was like a shrine to her dead husband.  She had a 20x30 picture of him on the wall and his urn was on the mantel, etc. I just started laughing. I didn't tell him that mine was only a 16x20 of Tom and that his urn is sitting on my dresser along with a substantial number of pictures of us together. His straw hat is still sitting on my fridge right where he left it and I haven't cleaned out his wardrobe yet. I'd like to think I'm ready to date and I think I am if I just meet him somewhere but I don't think I'm ready to have anyone come to my house. It's very hard for me to put all of this out of sight. I know I'll have to someday or I'll be alone the rest of my life and I don't want that either! I'm glad to see you getting out and enjoying life! I hope you have a happy New Year and you are blessed with good health and happiness!! Love, Mary

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

MARY, MARY...It is not that hard! I found out. We met the 1st time Sunday for lunch, he came here for Xmas Eve and I made all kinds of or'dourves and he asked me to go out for dinner tonight then I bowed out as I got an attack of flu like symptoms from the Remicade. I had to laugh at your talk of pictures. I too have a pic of Teddy on the wall That is I think 18 X 24 but it is in the Hallway so no one gets spooked. In the living room is the URN as it matches my décor, T always did match my décor! Lou is Italian and even though he is 80 he is very handsome, really. He is a tad slow as he has his own ailments so both of us are patient with the other. The bottom line is NO ONE should be alone. We will probably go to dinner Saturday and then Sunday he will come watch the BIG Packer Game with me. Just slow and easy but I love having the companionship.
When I left him at the restaurant Sunday I called Maria, T Sister in DFW and told her what a nice time we had we have many similarities. Before I called her I was trying to think of our 4 favorite songs of which one was sung to us at our wedding and I couldn't think of the name of it! I asked Maria what it was and she couldn't think either. I said, Maria, now listen to this. I looked up at the sky quickly while driving and I said LOUDLY, "Teddy what was the name of the song Pete Sorce sang?" And in 2 seconds it came to my mind loudly, it was "MORE than the greatest love..." Then I am almost home and a car cuts in front of me and the license plate was "OLBLUEYS" I used to call T that! WOW! Lou only made one remark to me during dinner that I set straight. He says, "I think you are still deeply in love with Teddy". I said of course I am, he didn't leave me because he wanted too. That was that.
What I am trying to say is that first little step is hard but any of you in the same position might give it a little try, none of us deserves to be lonely! And Mary I think you and I were pretty close on the timing of our guys! Love you girl.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Ladies, I can relate.  I'm way behind you two, but did go out for dinner in September with an acquaintance for our birthday's which are both in
September.  Recently went to a play with him and his son & girlfriend.   Just friends and taking it really slow.    He is 10 years older than me.   I don't think I can get too involved as I don't think I could go through again what I did when I lost Jim.   I too still have Jim's ashes and pictures and many personal items around and am not comfortable bring any one into my home.   I'm hoping for a casual friendship and someone to go out with now & then.  I guess we just have to try to do what we are comfortable with and hope for the best.   None of us deserve to be lonely for the rest of our time on this earth, but it isn't easy, is it?    So we'll just have to all see where this New Year takes us.  My best to both of you in the New Year.  It is good to know that we are not traveling this road alone.

Love & Hugs,
Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

To My Ladies....when you make that first step of meeting someone new always make sure its in a populated area and that someone knows where you are going. I thank you for allowing that commercial. We deserve some social enjoyment. No one says we have to fall in love but no one says we have to be alone either. I only want a companion and if he is bothered by Teddy's pictures the he is not the right one for me! Who gets jealous at 80??? Your right, an Italian does. HAHAHA
You are right Darla. You, Mary and Me happened fairly close together. And look at us......I think we are doing great! Sure wish we could all meet one day.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Lainy, congratulations on seeking companionship , as life is structured and best with a companion. You are a cc widow and you are able and deserve to escape the loneliness that comes with it. I hope you find the happiness we all seek. Sadly I have not sought companionship as I don't want to put anyone through what you have lived since losing teddy. You have dealt with it but that is pain that cannot be described. I always felt my cc would return so I chose to be a loner in that regard and its been tolerable, but I do get lonely and loneliness provokes thought and reflection, and a dog or two livens up your life a bit too. I asked god for love  last year and he gave me people who needed help. Go figure, so now I am too busy to find that which my heart tells me to avoid. I hope the new year brings you the health and happiness you deserve Lainy,    Pat

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Oh, Pat, you are so sweet and me? I would go for it. Don't need to get married again at my age but companionship sure beats being alone all the time. You CAN meet someone and make a friend first. Be up front and all and you would be surprised what might happen. LIFE is for the LIVING! Who knows what lies ahead  for any of us. I am 73 and didn't really want to be with someone 80. He is nice looking, funny and he has slowed down. What I am saying is his slowing down fits with my not feel good a lot because of the U.C. He understands and I understand and that makes it nice. He is coming for the Packer game this afternoon and so is my daughter and the 3 kids. Should be interesting. Pat, you have a beautiful and healthier New Year and please don't negate dipping your toe in the water!

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Lainey ,
   I hope you had a great time today with your new friend and family. I give you credit for introducing him to your family so soon. I think that might be the hardest thing for me. I have two friends I've been chatting with. One is divorced and very insistent on our meeting soon. I'm having minor surgery a week from tomorrow though and I want to wait until I recover from that. I tell everyone he's the one Tom sent for me because he's a short, bald fellow, a total opposite of Tom, but I don't care about that. He makes me laugh and I really like that. I guess my main concern is whether the person is healthy. Like Darla ,I really don't ever want to go through losing someone again. It's scary to think about. The other fellow is a widower of 15 months and I think it might be easier with him because we understand what each other has gone through and is going through! They are both a little younger than me so I like that too. I'll let you know how things go. At least it's something to look forward to and it's given me great incentive to lose weight! lol ! Happy New Year girls!! I hope it's a healthy happy one for all of us!

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Pat,
I am 50 and actively looking, even though I'm pretty sure I will put SOMEONE through dealing with my death. But I do NOT want to be alone. I give full disclosure, though, and have only had 2 people get past a 2nd date. But I will wait. I am very picky about the next one, as I want him to be the RIGHT one!
Unfortunately, the word cancer is a tough one, especially when you have to say no when asked if I can have surgery. I've tried full disclosure with bad results, partial disclosure (making it a "casual" remark), and have yet to meet someone who is willing to chance it to be with me. Hopefully he's out there.
As for Lainy... Of COURSE he had to have been charmed! Lainy is witty, adorable (yes, even with the wig) and I better stop before she gets a swelled head! lol
And Lainy, what a game this is!!!!

KrisJ
"Don't just have minutes in the day; have moments in time."
Any opinions I give are based on personal experiences, and are not based on medical knowledge. I strongly suggest receiving medical care and opinions.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Hello my cookie, I will not allow games, been there done that. Kris you are a delightful, smart lady and you deserve someone special! Personally and don't get angry with me but since I have met you.....I feel you go for the wrong Mr. Right! Ha Please don't ever give up, there is someone for everyone.

Mary, Mary...I love doing that with your name.  Well we had a great afternoon! It all went well and he adored my daughter...why not? LOL My Grands that came liked him too. Lexy who is 21 said, "Grandma, he is really, really nice". I was worried as I never wanted them to think anyone could take their  Papa's place. I only hope he was not too intimidated because Robin and I sound like stereo!!! She is truly a younger me but prettier. He and I planned the afternoon and Friday I asked him if he would mind if Robin and kids came too and he said it was fine with him. I don't have time to waste now so I just jump right in. He drives an hour to see me. Poor thing. BTW Robin also brought a new man. So it was a mother daughter thing going on. I don't think we should live being afraid to live. Who knows when and if something will happen we need to enjoy the here and now. I am NOT getting married again but the companionship is great.  Love you girls.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Lainy, I meant the FOOTBALL game!! lol
The GB game and the PHIL game were both nail biters!

I'm glad your afternoon went well and hope both "Mr. Maybes?" weren't too overwhelmed!!

KrisJ
"Don't just have minutes in the day; have moments in time."
Any opinions I give are based on personal experiences, and are not based on medical knowledge. I strongly suggest receiving medical care and opinions.

Re: Mr. Christmas Sends a Gift-Unbelievable

Ah, Kris you know me too well. We watched the AZ Cardinals vs 49ers and Green Bay vs Bears and both were nail biters. I know it was the kind of game for the Pack that Teddy almost fell off his seat and came down through the clouds. Wait! We have no clouds here just sun! Oh they played in Chi town so there were clouds! Ha, Ha I am so tired today I slept until 9AM. I never do that. SO sorry Gav and Percy! next year.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.