Topic: My John is gone

My husband John lost his fight today at 1:15. I was with him until he passed and it was peacefull. He had been in a coma for a week before he finally gave up.

I thought I was prepared but I found out how wrong I was. I thought my heart was going to come bursting out of my chest. I have never felt so much pain, sadness and the complete feeling of devestation.

Thank God for hospice. They were there in about 15 minutes. Maybe I should have waited to post this but I'm so alone and I knew you all would be there for me.

I really can't imagine life without John, it's a long and dismal road I have to walk now.

I love him with all my heart and soul.

Charlene

Re: My John is gone

Charlene, I am so very sorry for your loss.  I wish I knew what to say to comfort you.   Please know that we cry and mourn his loss with you.

May God bless you, comfort you, and give you strength through this grief.

~Lisa

Re: My John is gone

Charlene......please, accept my deepest sympathy.   Although, we never  seem to be prepared for the passing of our loved ones we do take comfort in knowing that they are in a safe place without suffering and pain, and that they have joined those who have gone before them.  You can count on us - we are here for you. 
One day at a time.
Sending all my love
Marion

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER

Re: My John is gone

Charlene

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your beloved John.  It sounds as if your struggle has been long and very difficult...I know you are grateful that he is no longer suffering and in pain.  Sending thoughts and prayers for comfort and peace in this difficult time.

Jean

Re: My John is gone

Thoughts and prayers to you. So sorry for your loss.

Re: My John is gone

Dearest Charlene, we are so very sorry to hear of John's passing. You were a wonderful wife and caregiver and helped him through this nightmare of a journey. What the 2 of you had will always live on in wonderful, loving memories and remember he will always be with you! I wish we could jump off these pages and give you warm hugs but our sincere prayers and thoughts will have to do across the cyberspace.  Our most heartfelt prayers to you and your family.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: My John is gone

Dear Charlene,

I don't think we are ever prepared for this & I am so sorry for what you have gone through & are now going through. Just remember that John is at peace & no longer in pain. I know just how you are feeling as I lost my husband Jim only 3 months ago & am still experiencing the pain, sadness & loss. It truely is devastating and the worst thing I have ever experienced. There is no easy way to get through this. All we can do is deal with it one day at a time. Something that has helped me is knowing that he will always be with me in my heart. I have found so much comfort & support from everyone on this site & I know that you will too. Charlene, know that my thoughts & prayers are with you at this very sad time in your life.

Love & Hugs,

Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: My John is gone

Charlene, I am so sorry about John and so thankful that he was not in pain.  We can never prepare for this even when we think it will be somehow a relief.  I've not lost my sweet Charlie yet, but I have lost other close loved ones.  It is never easy.  You will make it and we will be here for you and with you.  Please take care and post when you can.  Much love to you.

Carol

Re: My John is gone

Charlene,  My deepest sympathy to you on the passing of your husband, the love of your life.
God bless you and may he give you the strength to be strong.

Lulu

I miss you more and more everyday. 
RFL 6/28/58-12/27/08

Re: My John is gone

Charlene,

I am so sorry, I know John suffered so much in the past few months and that is very difficult to watch. For the caregiver it is like a marathon that you are not sure you can keep running but you don't want it to end. Now it is time to grieve and take care of yourself, rest and begin to pick up the pieces. It is not easy but since losing my Mom I have found much comfort here among our little support group, we are here for you.

Patty

Re: My John is gone

Charlene,
I am so very sorry to hear of John's passing.  Unfortunately I was in your shoes just over 2 months ago and I know the pain is more than any of us can ever prepare for.  Know that John will forever live in your heart.  Don't forget to take care of yourself during this difficult time.
Colleen

Re: My John is gone

Oh Charlene,
I am so sorry for your loss.  May you find peace within your memories.  Sending you and your family hugs and prayers.
Jolene

"Faith in something greater than ourselves enables us to do what we have said we'll do, to press forward when we are tired or hurt or afraid, to keep going when the challenge seems overwhelming and the course is entirely uncertain."     ~g. b. hinckley

Re: My John is gone

Charlene,
You and John were an inspirational team. The two of you fought his disease so long and hard. I am sorry for your loss and know that these words will not take your pain away. John is at peace and he will no longer suffer the physical, mental, and emotional pain he has been dealing with for years. He knew how much you loved him and you know how much he loved you. I am happy for both of you that the passing was peaceful. You and your husband will continue to be in my prayers.

We are all here for you.
Kris

Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

36 year old patient with buckets of hope

Re: My John is gone

Thank you for all the support.
I really had no idea it would be this incredibly hard to have him die, I thought I was prepared but when it came to the actual moment of him leaving I was hysterical.

It's been a week and two days and it seems like an eternity. I'm taking it one day and sometimes one minute at a time.

I miss him with every ounce of my being, I think of every cross word I used with him, every time I was tired and snapped at him and am ashamed.
John should never have had to endure that at all, but he still loved me no matter what.

I have to learn to live with that but he was and always will be my husband who I loved more than anything.

Thank you all again,
Charlene

Re: My John is gone

Charlene,

Try not to dwell on all the negative things & remember all of the good. I too have felt so much of that guilt & was told that he knows how much I loved him & that I did the best that I could under the circumstances. It is so hard to let all of that go though. Just remember all the love that you shared & that John knows how much you loved him & still do. Keep him in your heart forever and you will never be alone. You also have all of us here ready to listen or help whenever you need it. This site has been a great source of comfort & support for me & many others as it will be for you too.

You are in my thoughts & prayers.

Love,
Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: My John is gone

Hi Charlene,
So sorry to hear of John's death.  My Joe is only days away and I can't imagine what it will be like.  We spend so much of our day taking care of them in these last months.  The outside world goes away.  Joe has been in hospice a month and we thought he would be gone now but there must be a reason he is still here. My heart goes out to you and I am sure I will be on this site when I am home alone and looking for people who have walked in these shoes.  May God  give you comfort in the lonely nights and friends to hold you during the days.  One day at a time - I'm trying that too.  God Bless.  Mary Anne

17 (edited by JeffG Fri, 05 Dec 2008 12:31:47)

Re: My John is gone

Charlene.... You two fought a rough and tough battle.  I'm sorry John has left us all.  He'll be missed, but you have loving memories despite the rough and emotional passing.  Please think of them often.  I truely believe it will lesson the pain in the long run.  Your natural instinct of love will keep him with you forever.
God bless,
Jeff

Take it to the Limit,One More Time! (Eagles)