Topic: Shirley - My Sister

My sister Shirley passed away on January 23, 2009 between 6:30 and 7:00 a.m. at the Kansas City Hospice House.  I was with her for her final days here on Earth.  I will say that this is absolutely the most horrible disease I have ever encountered and I pray that I never have to sit with a loved one dying ever again.  I did it so that I could help her pass as comfortably as she could.  But she did suffer.  That disease made it to where she could not eat or drink for the last 13 days of her life.  I am thankful she is at peace now but I am sad that she is gone. 

Thank you for this website.

Teresa

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa, I am so sorry for the loss of your sister.  May she rest in peace, and may God comfort you and your family.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa, we are so sorry to hear of your sister's passing. She was very lucky to have you help ease her through this terrible journey. Try to remember the good times and the way she was before CC took its hold. Remember she is never far away as she is forever in your heart. Our prayers go to you and your family.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

What a brave, honorable person you are Teresa.  I admire your strength and courage during such an awful, awful time.  I pray that God brings you comfort, healing and continued strength throughout the days to come.

Love,
Heather

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa,

I am sorry for your loss. I know it is sad, but as you said, she is now at peace & no longer suffering from this terrible disease.. Just remember that she will always be close by & forever in your heart.

It was wonderful that you could be there for her to help easy her passing.  I know how hard it is to watch a loved one pass away from CC. You & your family are in  my thoughts & prayers.

Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Dear Teresa,
All my sympathy for the loss of your sister. I know your heart is broken right now, and I wish I had the words to heal you. We're all here for you, and we empathize. It was truly noble of you to be with your sister at the end. May she rest in peace.
Joyce M

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa,

Accompanying someone along the road this disease follows is the most difficult thing I have ever done. I have never felt so helpless, we can show compassion but we cannot will mercy on the sick. I hope you have loved ones around you who can accompany you and comfort you as you grieve.

Patty

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa,

I am so sorry to hear of Shirley's death but so glad she had you with her. You are an incredible woman and Shirley was so fortunate to have such a loving and caring sister with her through her journey. 

I know you are probably drained, tired and weary right now.  Concentrate on taking care of youself and try and focus on the wonderful memories you have of your sister.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers. 

Hugs,

Pam

My Mom lost her one year battle with CC on April 3, 2009.

"A prognosis is simply an audit of how truly precious each day is.  Live each day to the maximum, celebrate what was, and what is - Don't spend your life looking forward to what will or might be." .... words of wisdom from my beloved son on hearing of his grandmother's CC prognosis.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Dear Teresa,

Sincere condolensenses and sympathies on the passing of your sister.  I remember when you joined this group.  You have been a very kind, compassionate & loving sister.  You helped her so much in the fight against this horrid disease.  Rememeber all the wonderful times you and your sister had together.  Prayers for you and your family.

Karen

Wishing all God's blessings!

Re: Shirley - My Sister

It is amazing how hearing from other people who are affected by this disease or have watched somebody pass away can help so much.  I cried so much reading your responses but it felt very good. 

The one thing that I hope I portrayed throughout this horrible journey was how much I loved my sister Shirley.  She was 42 and left a 13 year old son and a 15 year old daughter.  She was my very best friend for 40 years.  I have a huge hole in my heart right now.  I know that I will make it because I have wonderful children and an awesome husband of 20 years.  But it will be a much sadder life than it was supposed to be.  I guess I should have made more friends in my life.

But I do want you guys to know that you help people so much on this site.  You are wonderful.  I never posted much but when I did, I received awesome support.  Please know what great work and friendship you give.  Thank you again. 

Teresa

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Dear Teresa,

Don't be a stranger. Keep coming back. I didn't find this site until a few days after my husband passed on & I can't tell you how much comfort & support I have gotten from everyone here. No one can know what we have & are going through except those of us who have lived it.  How much you loved your sister did come through & I know that she knows that too.

Be good to yourself now & take care of yourself & your lovely family. Also know that you have "family" here too, to come to when you are feeling down. I also find that helping others new to the site helps me too.

Love,
Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

I just put my sister's picture on the faces of this website.  I hope it shows up soon so you can all see how beautiful she was!!!

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Hi Teresa,

I also lost my sister to this horrible disease. She was 32 years old and left her husband and four young children behind.

I can so relate to what you are saying about being best friends for 40 years. I do have a lot of friends, but I still miss my sister.

It has been 2 years since she passed away and there are still days that out of no where, I just start crying. I think time has helped some, but as you said, my life will always be sadder since losing her.

I hope you find comfort in all the wonderful memories you have of your beautiful sister.

Take care of yourself!

Karen

Re: Shirley - My Sister

May Shirley rest in peace.  My sincere condolences to you all. 
God Bless,
Jeff G.

Take it to the Limit,One More Time! (Eagles)

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa -

I followed Shirley's story on your blog and could feel the love you had for each other in the words that you wrote.  I know you miss her with every ounce of your being.  I don't believe any sister could have done more than you did to help her.

Also, I want you to know how much your blog meant to me as I, too have a sister with cholangiocarcinoma - she is 43.

I am thinking of you and your family at this very hard time in your life. 

Terri

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Tano,

I am sorry for your loss.

I am always struck by how this disease strikes such young people. I have told my 86 year old father that if anything, he is lucky he got this now instead of 40 years ago.

I expect we will see more of this disease as the use of statins continues.

It is time for you to take care of yourself now.

Jan

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa,
My heart aches for you. I wish there were words that could make the hurt go away, or even lessen a little bit. All I can say is I'm so sorry for your loss, and my prayers are with you and your family.
Robyn

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa,
I am so sorry for your loss. I keep writing this, but sisters are so special. I am sure your presence by her side eased her and brought her comfort. I cant imagine your pain and I dont know what to say. Please try to remember Shirley as SHE was not as cc made her. The end must have been terrifying and so emotional. Please take time to heal and talk about your sister with friends and family. People who knew her and who she was.

I will  keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Kris

Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

36 year old patient with buckets of hope

Re: Shirley - My Sister

I am backtracking a bit but I hope you are ok.My sister has been diagnosed with another type of cancer and has started chemo yesterday.We are close too and as we lost my husband so quickly I am very stressed       
                kind regards   Janet

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Dear Teresa,

God bless you and comfort you. You remind me of my cousin Sharan. At the end, when my husband was on hospice here at home, she fly across the country to be with us at the end. She is my closest friend, and she is a former hospice nurse, and I can''t tell you what that meant to me to have her here for us. I will never forget her kiindness in doing that final favor - I don't know how I could hae gotten through it alone. You are so right - this is a horrid, horrid disease, and I pray every day for a cure.

Joyce C.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Wow, this was comforting to see the posts on here this morning.  I'm not o.k.  She should be here with me.  It sucks when during the day I get the need to talk to her or get some advice from her like I did every single day of my life and she is not here.  I'm not sure that will ever get better.  And I hate that there are so many people going through it.  I am sad for everyone.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Dear Teresa,

You are absolutely right. Everything about this SUCKS!!! I know just what you are saying. It is so hard to believe that they are gone & will never be here with us again. I saw the picture you posted & Shirley was a beautiful person and so are you. I can only say again what keeps me going. They may be gone, but they will all be with us, in our hearts forever.

I too hate this cancer for how it has affected all of us.  Atleast we all have each other to lean on for strength & support. God bless this site & everyone on it.

Love & Hugs,
Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

It is amazing the support you receive and I know that it will get better.

I do hope that the picture I posted of my sister and I on this website will show the world how much I love her.  I can feel our love every time I look at that picture. 

Thank you guys for the support.  I know I get negative on here sometimes...I tried being positive in the beginning and it didn't work.  Thanks for putting up with me.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa,

You can't help but get negative at times. We have all been through so much. I get negative too. It is so hard to stay postive all the time. Like you said, it just doesn't work. We are all here to help & support each other when we need it the most. You are right, this site & the people on it are all amazing.

Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: Shirley - My Sister

Teresa, love the picture of you and Shirley.  You can see the love and strength of two beautiful, wonderful women.  I know you miss her terribly.  I feel negative some too, but everyone here puts up with me too, no matter what. 

Praying for better tomorrows,
Carol