Topic: Lost my mom

I lost my mother on 26-april 2007 due to this fatal diseases.I never understand why this much happens in such a short span of time as she was detected of having cholangiocarcinoma somewhere around last week of march-07. She had severe jaundice and itching.At TATA MEMORIAL HOSPITAL,MUMBAI (one of the best cancer hospital in asia) doctors done ERCP and stenting.They placed a metal stent claiming that it will help in lowering jaundice.Doctor's said that cancer is in advance stage and is metastatic and thus inoperable and stenting is the only treatment available with them.As a result of stenting,itching stopped and jaundice also lowered somewhat.
But all of sudden on 26 april bleeding started from mouth and other openings and in a fierce battle with destiny she lost her life at an age of mere 48.
She never suffred from any disease in her life.She was neither diabetic nor have any blood pressure problems.I never known that such a tumor is making home in her body.I am still unable to accept this cruel decision of ALMIGHTY and have certain questions in mind n would really appreciate if someone reply:
1.Is it possible that tumor originate and developed to advance stage in such a short span of one month or it is there in body for substantial  amount of time and if it is there then why there were no symptoms?
2.Is Cholangiocarcinoma is not curable if it is detected in advance stage or its treatment is there somewhere in world?
3.As I said my mom undergone Stenting,what I seen her problems increased after it though both itching & jaundice comes down but abdomen pain and vomiting increase.Is stenting was wrong action taken?
4.How could I help person who are suffering from same.

Lots Of Love for You,MOM !!!!!
May you reside in heaven with devine souls

Re: Lost my mom

Pranjal, I am so sorry for your loss and I know the pain you must be feeling. My mother died 2 months after diagnosis also. And I also had a lot of questions. Please don't feel guilty or like you could have done something more - you did all you could do for her, and this disease is horrible and fast-moving sometimes. By the time tumors grow large enough to cause symptoms, most people are too advanced for treatment.  IT's a deadly and silent disease at first, and I do believe my mother didn't have any tumors until maybe a year before her diagnosis, but it didn't show up on blood tests until she had hundreds of tumors on her liver and was near the end. There is just no way to detect this cancer most times.

As for your question about stenting, I believe you did the right thing to allow the stent - it helped the jaundice, but it was too late to do more. For some people, stents allow them to live for a year or maybe many more years, but it all depends on where the tumors are and how aggressive the disease is.  The stent didn't kill your mother - the horrible cancer did. You did nothing wrong - everyone on this board has experience with stents and there are usually no problems. My mother was vomiting and uncomfortable at the end, and that was just the way this disease progresses when it's very advanced.

It must feel terrible to lose your mother at such a young age and so suddenly - my deepest sympathies are with you.  I know you were there for your mother and she knew that you loved her and that's the best thing you could have done for her.
- Joyce

Re: Lost my mom

Pranjal,  My sincere sympathy for the lost of your Mom.  Like Joyce said You absolutelty did nothing wrong.  This disease can go for years before being detected.  If by chance it is discoverd early the chances of a cure are pretty much nil.  The Doctors can do their best to try and control and treat it with hopes of slowing it down some and to provide pallative care for relief of pain and juandice.  But then that is  not a sure thing.  It is considered a systemic cancer which means it is in your blood stream and could pop up any where even if surgical removal of primary tumor . I'm one of those people who discovered it early and been battling for many years.  Although the primary tumor was resceted it still spread to my lungs and and returned to the opposite side of my liver. I sometimes wish it had been the opposite (not knowing) as it has been many years of of the big questions of when and how I will see the end of my days.  However, I chose to give it my best and hope for a novel treatment that may be lurking around the corner.  Again. you did your best as know one can tell how quickly or when it will be discoverd.  The gruesume reality of this type cancer is that of many lossed love ones.  I keep going out of love for my family, but as time progresses I have the knowledge of seeing what is coming next and try to deal with it a little bit differently than some others.  I guess I'm like the the turtle looking at the finish line but see the rabbit  getting their first and maybe finding a good treatment or cure before I arrive at the line.  So, as you see many emotions and trial and errors are out there.  Pranjil, just being there for your Mom and showing her your love and support was the best thing in the world.  God Bless you and Your Family!  Peace be with You!
Jeff G.

Take it to the Limit,One More Time! (Eagles)

Re: Lost my mom

Hi Pranjal-My heart goes out to you at this very difficult time.    My husband was also diagnosed at the end of March 07.   He has lost a lot of weight but thankfully so far has no pain or nausea or jaundice.   He does have many liver tumors but the treatment he is getting they think is shinking them which will hopefully give him more time.  Like Jeff, we are hoping something new will be around the corner to improve chances.   Again, my sympathies to you and your family.  Your Mom was lucky to have you.  I don't know  how anyone goes through this alone.  Patrice

5 (edited by manu Wed, 30 May 2007 17:19:10)

Re: Lost my mom

Dear Pranjal,
I am very sorry to hear about your loss.My Mom is battling with Cholangio ca in India as well. You can get  similar medical care in India nowadays as you would anywhere in the world.But unfortunately the disease is usually diagnosed in advanced stages.A lot of patients only tolerate a stent placement which is done for palliative reasons. I can understand what you must be going through and can relate with it . Please let me know if I can be of more help to you in anyway. You did everything right.Its the disease which is dreadful .

Re: Lost my mom

dear pranjal- srry to hear of ur loss i too lost my mum 26th april 07, she was diagnosed end of feb 07 deteriotated in such a short time, she ad to av a stent for the jaundice, lost lots of weight, gained fluid. n spent end of her days in hospital at 52, its no age hun. she at mets biliary carcinoma) and i dnt think there are any answer o ut there. its a silent killer well thats my opinion. its undetected and in most cases too late b4 it can be treated cruel it is.  my heart goes out to  u i truly no how u are feelin,.. take care xx