Sorry I am just getting the chance to write and give everyone an update on Dad. Things have been such a rollercoaster ride the last few days. As of yesterday morning the confusion and hallucinating seem to have subsided, so I truely believe that he was over medicated with the fentanyl and oxycodone. He does not have access to his medications anymore, they are all hidden. He was still pretty sick yesterday morning, but as the day went on, he seemed to improve slightly. He is once again not complaining of any pain, but is still nauseous. It also seems that the vomiting is worse in the morning, and of course his meds come right up along with the bile. I suggested maybe trying the compazine in suppository form, thinking it may get into his system to do the job. He is trying to eat, very little of course, and is drinking fluids better. Although I know he is dehydrated, he is keeping more fluids down for the time being, so I am not going to fight with him about the hospital. I did tent his skin on his hand to show him how dehydrated he is and compared it to mine, but he just laughed and rubbed his skin till it went back into place. He is so stubborn, yet I am the same, one of his bad traits that he passed onto me. I am really a bullhead, and everyone reminds me of that daily.
The testing went well and the results of the MRI show NO mets to his brain, which is just what I had expected to hear. The results of the CatScan of his chest, abdomen and pelvis and the PetScan will not be given to us until Tuesday, ah yes, we wait once again.Of course when Dad was made to drink the concoction for the CatScan, is was only minutes until he vomited all that back up, but they did not make him drink anymore. Dad said to me as we were waiting that by the time they get the results and figure out what they need too, we should just call the funeral director and save a step, because he is going to die before they decide how to treat him. Sometimes I have to agree with him as it is all so frustrating. We just want answers, so that we can make decisions, and keep him comfortable. I know my Dad never thought he would have to suffer through an illness like this, he always thought he would have a major heart attack and go quickly. He would never have to worry about being taken care of, or losing his independence and dignity. I think that is the most diffcult part for him and of course for me, I always thought he was indestructable.
When we got the results of the MRI today, he once again seemed a little relieved, so I think his spirits picked up a little. In fact he was joking a little more like Dad, so far as to put on a dark jacket and dark hat and tell Mom he was all dressed for Halloween. Mom said "What are you talking about Jim?" and he answered chuckling, "I am going out as the Walking Dead". I know it must sound morbid to all of you, but that is my Dad's sense of humor as morbid as it may be. That is how he deals with this. However, he was then caught talking to the dog, and telling her that he wasn't long for this world, and she would have to live with the Warden (Mom). I have had thier yellow lab Abbey on a diet for months because she is obese, and Mom remains strict with her. Dad on the other hand still feeds her whatever he is eating, and lately thats alot, since he is eating so little. AHHHHHHHH but I can't yell at him, not now. He loves that dog. Dad is like me with the animals, in that he loves them more than some people, as thier love is true and unconditional. They love you no matter what and never ask for anything more than to be close and by your side.
Dad asked me today if I was taking a ride with him tomorrow to the Flea Market. I said are you up to that, and he told me, oh yeah, its going to be a nice day tomorrow.
So Mom and me will go with him even though he usually gets pretty sick while we are there, but he still wants to go and I think it comforts him. I actually thought that I could take my camera, and snap some photos of him without him taking notice to what I am doing. My parents anniversary is on Sunday, and I am going to get some photos of them together as well. I cannot take them out or do anything special for them, as he would rather just be home, but I will try to make it special as best I can.
So, I am back to trying to be and think positve once again, and take in all I can while he is having a few good days. My brother is stopping up tomorrow night to see him, and I think he is looking forward to that as well. So I am hoping for a good weekend with him, I do LOVE him so much.
Thanks for all your input and advice, caring and support,