Oh Julia, I am heartbroken for you. And yet I know too that a peaceful death is so vitally important and it sounds like Sue had just that. I hate this cancer so much I want to see it in its physical form and beat the crap out of it.
I just wanted to briefly comment Julia on what you said in an earlier post a few days ago about "Sue's demons". Rest assured Julia that the discomfort and restlessness that occurs shortly before a passing is very normal and it's not so much distress or demons, it's a transition from this world to the next. It's possible that Sue wasn't even consciously yearning to go home, she was merely transitioning from one state to another. A few days before Diarmuid passed away, he couldn't get comfortable and was up and down and sighing and moving around. The doctor said to me "it's not physical, it's not emotional and it's not even psychological". She believed it was the first step in his soul's journey to a better place. I only mention this so you won't think that Sue was too distressed.
Love and hugs for you Julia. May Sue rest in peace.
“The dead are now in a place where there is no more shadow, darkness, loneliness, isolation, or pain. They are home.”
― John O'Donohue, Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom
"The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares." [Henri Nouwen]