Topic: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down

Well, for those of you who "celebrate" it's the holidays.  For me, these were the best times for my Mom.  I became a scrooge sometime ago, and now I feel fortunate that I did.  We lost my Mom in August, and it stings to even type that. 

I know I am not alone, but I feel it now anyway.  It helps to be forthright with my feelings, negative or positive.  I have good days and bad, and there a long story to go along with the saga.  I'll leave that for another day and just reach out and say... you are not alone.

If you have a loved one recently diagnosed, I don't want to paint your picture, but I have been there and think it might help me to help you. 

Just trying to stay constructive with my energy.

Re: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down

ljg....thank you for reaching out and offering your help to others.  Big cyberhug for all.


Re: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down

Just lost Grandma on Thursday. The holidays are not "great" this year. She was diagnosed in Oct. Happened so fast.

Still a little numb. Thanks for the post. Helps me not feel so isolated.


Re: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down

Thanks back at you. 
We are here, remember, to live fully.  (((hugs))) -ljg

Re: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down

You too!

Re: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down


Thank you for your post. I lost my husband of almost 42 years Sept. 2 after only 7 very short weeks.  He was 62.  I am still trying to understand & deal with it.  Remember that you are not alone either. You have everyone here to help & support you. We all understand what everyone is going through as we all have been there or are dealing with it now.

Lots of Love & Hugs,


"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

7 (edited by ljg Tue, 23 Dec 2008 09:32:51)

Re: Cholangiocarcinoma's got me down

I want to tell you how happy I am to hear that you, Darla, are processing your husband's death and are able to be constructive here.  In fact, my father died suddenly in August 2007 of a non-related issue, and the stress and reaction that my Mother dealt with was all-consuming.  She grieved and stayed in that mode, transfixed in a way that was possibly unhealthy for her.   

Other circumstances added to the situation, and in retrospect I feel like the cholangiocarcinoma was given fuel.  Stress is extremely difficult on the body.  In turn, and given both deaths being so close together, I struggle with the stages of grief for them both.  It is an amazingly difficult time for what is left of my family.  Both my parents were merely 61 and I actually worried about them aging (well beyond their 60s).

I am trying very hard not to stay in fight or flight in my own reaction to my Mother's death, and to process these emotions and not turn it all inward, letting the stress of the situation impact my health. 

At 61, my mother had just weeks to comprehend that her disease was extremely advanced and that she would loose her battle.  Later, it seemed a relief for her to let go and leave this complicated world.   I ultimately respect that, but promised not let her sudden death destroy me, to remain positive in the face of adversity, and to focus on my own health and balance my life... to go on living with her in mind.  Losing parents has an amazing impact on a child.  Losing both in less than a year informs you that you must live fully every day. 

We are survivors, here, joined by a common disease.  Our new goal should be to care for ourselves well and to appreciate that we are alive today. 

Hugs to you all.  -ljg