Jennifer, well you and I have the almost the same sad story. My mom also passed away too fast. She waited too long, when I went through all her papers and cabinets, it seemed as though she knew something was wrong. She was suppose to have tests done a long time before she was admitted. When I cleaned out her cabinets I found every possible, stomach medicine you could buy over the counter. She was a very private person when it came to her health. It wasnt like she was going to call me and say " gee, my stool is black as coffee grounds!" or I am so itchy I am scratching my skin right off. I loved my mom so much that sometimes I think I was boarder line possessive. Till this day I feel like the chain had been broken and there is a piece of me that is floating around trying to come home. This year I am going to try to make an effort to sit out on my deck like I did everyday with her. She loved my home and the peacefullness. You see, I live in a small community with forests, lots of trees, frogs, wildlife. I have my own pond out back that she would just watch things swim back and forth. I know it is hard to think of the day she passed and the hell she went through, but the one thing but the one you will always have are the good times.
When you wake up every morning, ask yourself this question: " I have a choice, will I be a happy person or am I going to be a sad person " Did you choose the right one?