Topic: Blah.

I just got back from the hospital...no chemo again because my liver values are not so hot. The bad news continues....the PET scan revealed abnormalities in a lymph node and in my liver. They are not sure if they are cancer or not...could be inflamation from the surgery, but most likely not. There is also a possiblility I have a blood clot in my shoulder. I will have a test to check for that as well as a ultrasound with contrast to check the liver. They are waiting on the lymph node test because they want chemo to have a chance at it first.

I am on steroids and have now been taken off my antidepressent to help my liver. I am already devastated about the news and delay in chemo again. I am not sure how I will handle things without the zoloft. I will have more bloodwork on Thursday to see if it is working. There is a possibility I will change my chemo regime to Gemzar instead of Xeloda and quite the Avastan, but keep the Oxaliplatin.

I am so  upset. I feel great. I dont understand how things could gotten so bad so fast when I feel so good. My doctor said I looked great too. I told him that I have not given up so they could not either to which he replied that for someone like me they leave no stones unturned.

How can I fight this cancer when my liver is protesting? It is a liver enzyme, not the bilirubin that is up. BLAH. I am so frustrated and angry and scared right now.

Kris

Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

36 year old patient with buckets of hope

Re: Blah.

Oh, Kris, I am so sorry to hear what is happening. You may not think so, but your attitude still sounds good. Is there not a kinder antidepressent they can try? Sounds like you have a wonderful doctor. Sure don't blame you for feeling scared, but I know you have a lot of spunk in you and we will be your cheerleaders....fight, fight, fight!

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

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You hang in there, Kris.  You've been through so much over these last few months you deserve to have a pity party.  I always found that acknowledging my pain and hurt for a day helped me pick myself up the next and go on with a smile.

Did the doctor say if there are any medications or herbs besides milk thistle that will help your liver out?

We love you!

Re: Blah.

Dear Kris,

I am so sorry you have to be dealing with all of this bad news.  You have already been through so much. I think your attitude is pretty darn good under the circumstances.   You have every right to be upset, frustrated, angry & scared. It really is hard to understand how you can feel so good & be so sick, isn't it? But that seems to be the nature of this horrible disease.  I hate this monsterous cancer. It is so sneaky & unpredictable. There is just no way of knowing what will come next.  Come back & vent all you want.  We are all here for you. Take care of yourself Kris and let us know how things are going. Keep that great attitude. That is what will get you through.

I will be thinking of you and hoping for the best.

Lots of Love & Hugs,

Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: Blah.

Hello Kris,

I'm right with ya on this one....BLAH!! You are one real person and I found myself giggling at somethin' sassy you said just a couple days ago!! You have a wonderful sense of humor and I am sure that is what has kept you going and will continue. But it's hard to ignore such bad news when it hits ya smack in the face! I hope that they can figure out a different chemo regimen that will help! I am glad you are feeling and looking great! Although it adds to the confusion of this recent news, I don't think I've read a complaint from you yet so we of course are here for you to yell, scream, cry all you want!

Hugs,

Ashlea

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My dear sassy Kris,

Vent away!!!!  If we all need to come and give your liver a pep talk (or kick) then we'll be there!!!

You sound as if you have a wonderful doctor and to hear he won't leave any stones unturned is great news!

Listen carefully and you'll hear all of us cheering you on! 

Hugs to you and a swat at your liver to get with the program!

You are in my thoughts and prayers!!!

Pam

My Mom lost her one year battle with CC on April 3, 2009.

"A prognosis is simply an audit of how truly precious each day is.  Live each day to the maximum, celebrate what was, and what is - Don't spend your life looking forward to what will or might be." .... words of wisdom from my beloved son on hearing of his grandmother's CC prognosis.

7 (edited by marions Mon, 30 Mar 2009 18:35:17)

Re: Blah.

Kris

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER

Re: Blah.

Hi Kris;
I'm new to this board and wanted to offer my support and prayers for you during this time. I love the outlook of your Doctor. How refreshing!! Now for those darn liver function tests, we need to get your liver up and running like a beautiful, sleek race horse. ( I know the expression is supposed to be a well oiled machine but I love horses!) I don't know what you are taking or on for supplements but let me share with you what I tried and am still on.
1) 20 milk thistle seeds chewed daily
2) Genesis liquid  4 ounce daily
3) Essiac tea with echinacea and cleavers 1 ounce at bedtime

I also use accupuncture. I dont understand it at all but I know it helped with pain/nausea at first and I know she does points for toning different systems that are weak or stressed. I still go every 2-3 weeks depending on how I'm doing and what she recommends.
I am on other supplements as well for additional immune boost, GI support and general nutrition. The first 3 supplements I mentioned I've been on since early on, milk thistle in capsule form and the Genesis I started as soon as I was told I had a problem with my liver. The Essiac with additives I started within a month of diagnosis when I started accupuncture. My liver function studies were 5X normal when I started. My accupuncturist told me to be careful when my levels were so high, that I needed to decrease the stress on my liver. At that time I couldnt sleep without a sleeping pill but she said that the sleeping pill I was on wasn't as bad as others and that it was important to get rest too. Maybe there is another alternative for your antidepresant? If you are feeling good enough to get a little exercise that may be enough to boost your serotonin levels and I agree with Marion that sunshine may help. This may sound silly, but I bounced on a mini-trampoline. I was told it would help my lymph system I think she said the jogging/bouncing would help it drain/flow. I wanted to know what I could do for my lymph system because I had so much "activity" in it at first and when I was going for the Pet scan before they would agree to surgery I knew if it was still there  I would be ruled out, so I tried everything. I didnt feel that great and was fairly tired but I tried to bounce a little at least a couple of times a day. The cleavers also helps with the lymph system. By the way, my bilirubin was always normal also, it was just the liver function levels that were bad. I dont know if any of this helps but it's what I did and I'm still doing. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help.
Jamie

Re: Blah.

Kris, You remind me so much of Lee.  Your attitude, your fight, your grace. I am so sorry for the yucky news. Please, please know that Em and I will be praying so very hard for you tonite and every nite thereafter.  You are winning the fight right now even if you don't feel like you are because you are not giving up...you aren't quitting!  Hang in there sweet one...we are all here for you!

Love,
Heather

Re: Blah.

Dear Kris  how frustrating for you.I am really sorry your having all these setbacks.If your feeling  well that has to mean things arent too far off track maybe.Take care and do some nice things for yourself
                                                 love from  Janet

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Dear Kris,
Many cyberhugs to you and here's hoping they find some benign answer for all of this. Keep up your great attitude ! Have a pint of ice cream and a good cry - you deserve it.
Joyce M

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Kris,  arrrrgg!  I read your post a while ago, then I got mad and had to turn my computer off.   I went on my treadmill, and just thought "can Kris please get a break?"  Kris, you are always such a breath of fresh air, there are things you say sometimes that just make me laugh out loud.  I think about you often, I even talk about you.  I know today was rough, and difficult news is not easy or fair, but if there was ever a fighter, it is you.   Be pissed, sad, frustrated all you want, then do what you do best- get back out there and keep fighting("easy for you to say" you say, ha!) 
I did go online and was reading about a bunch of natural liver detoxer recipes.  One involved 8 ounces pear, 4 ounces cabbage, 2 ounces celery, 1 ounce watercress, all put into a juicer or blender.    Doesnt sound very good, but cabbage came up a lot on detox sites, and so did fresh lemon juice.  Allright, I am still mad, but  I am confident you are going to keep fighting  especially with a Doctor in your corner.   Im cheering via cyber for you.  God Bless You
Peace and Prayer
Barbara

The  Lord is my shephard

Re: Blah.

Kris I have a nephew  in Sweden and an ex sister-in-law that I am very fond of -just to let you know that the country is often in my thoughts and you too
                                                        Janet

Re: Blah.

Thanks everyone. I am feeling better today. I am continueing to take milk thistle. I have not let anything pass my lips that doesnt qualify as "healthy" or "helpful" for the liver. I have even cut the milk out of my tea...oohh the sacrifices I must make! Surely that is a fate worse than death?

I am still feeling physically great. The weather has started to get better so hopefully I will be out on my bike soon. My sister arrives on Wednesday for two weeks of girl time. We might go on a late deal somewhere and just sit in the sun...depending on my chemo. Will find out more on Thursday.

Thanks again.

Kris

Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

36 year old patient with buckets of hope

Re: Blah.

Dearest kris,
   I am so sorry about the misbehaving liver, and all the rest of the yucky stuff. Glad, though that your Sister is coming to visit you - that will be a help, won't it? I am going to keep thinking that all this stuff is going to go away, you are going to go back to the chemo, and everything is going to come out all right. Isn't there an anti-depressant that doesn't get processed through the liver, or am I being silly? 

Lots of cyber hugs to you,.

Joyce C.

Re: Blah.

devoncat wrote:

Thanks everyone. I am feeling better today. I am continueing to take milk thistle. I have not let anything pass my lips that doesnt qualify as "healthy" or "helpful" for the liver. I have even cut the milk out of my tea...oohh the sacrifices I must make! Surely that is a fate worse than death?

I am still feeling physically great. The weather has started to get better so hopefully I will be out on my bike soon. My sister arrives on Wednesday for two weeks of girl time. We might go on a late deal somewhere and just sit in the sun...depending on my chemo. Will find out more on Thursday.

Thanks again.

Kris

Hi Kris;
I use rice milk or almond milk. I've been told it is OK to use and a healthier alternative to regular dairy. Enjoy your girl time and I'll keep you in my prayers. Good luck on Thursday and keep us posted on how you are doing.
God Bless,
Jamie

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Kris,

Sorry about your liver enzyme not cooperating, I have some unconventional advice. My 11 year old niece wants to be a teacher but she has a twisted sense of humor so she actually wants to be a "mean" teacher, she has a school set up in her basement and she has hung up many signs, one of which says "Don't waste my time!" I guess one of her teachers says that all the time so my advice is to play "mean" patient and make a big ole sign with construction paper and marker that says "Don't waste my time! I got chemo to do and a zillion other things on my list!" There is a bench in the basement and there is actually a sign on it that says "naughty bench." Just visualize sending any misbehaving enzymes there.

Oh, and have some good sister time!

Patty

p.s. I second Jamie's suggestion about the rice milk or as they call it down Mexico way, horchata. Try it, Mikey, you'll like it!

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Hey Kris, I'm glad you're feeling better.  Get out on that bike and go.  There's nothing like laughing with a sister or brother.  Enjoy it, I know you both will.  Yay for better weather.  I understand the sacrifice of no milk in your tea and I admire you.  Someone would have a big fight on their hands if they tried to take away my french vanilla creamer for my coffee.  I gotta' have it!  Not a day goes by that I don't think of you and keep you in my prayers.  Love you!

Carol

Re: Blah.

Dear Kris,
I don't know if this will help or not but my husband is in the same position as you - not on Xeloda (due to infection) and he was informed of lymph node involvement and spots on the liver which we were told meant that the CC has metastisized to his liver...to make a long story short - the lymph nodes lit up on the PET because of the recent invasive procedures in his liver/bile duct and the liver spots came from an infection. One doctor told us that it was 99% metastisis - now 2 weeks later we're back on track. (although like you, we're waiting on chemo). Like you, he felt great. You sound like a very positive person with a happy and full life. you'll do just fine without the Zoloft. Tough times and my thoughts and prayers are with you. You're not alone in this fight and we're all with you.
Warmest wishes,
Danielle