1 (edited by marilyn dietz Thu, 23 Jul 2009 20:22:55)

Topic: missing my husband Tom, (Dad of 2 and granddad of 3: Didi)

I am writing this after my wonderful husband, Tom died in Feb., 2008 of cholangiocarcinoma.  I have not up to this point been able to write about it, although I did go onto this site during his battle.  Tom was diagnosed In July of 2007.  He fought for 71/2 months and thought initially that he could beat it. He was the strongest person I have ever met.  He was so brave--he didn't want to leave us.  Surgery was not an option--he went through 21/2 rounds of chemo--the side effects were very hard on him.  He was in the hospital for a week in Dec. 2007, and then went back in the hospital  Feb.4 2008 and died Feb. 9th 2008.  He was 58, we were married for almost 39 years.  We miss him  terribly.  I am thankful that he isn't suffering, but we feel that he still had so much to give.  Our lives will never be the same.  He loved the Louisville Cardinals. Everytime our little grandson sees a cardinal bird he says "hi Didi".  So sweet and so sad.  Thinking of and praying for all the families that have gone through this terrible disease with their loved one.

marilyn

Re: missing my husband Tom, (Dad of 2 and granddad of 3: Didi)

Marilyn,

Thank you for sharing your thoughts & feelings. I am so sorry for your loss.  Know that you are not alone.  I too lost my husband to this horrible disease Sept. 2, 2008 in less than 2 months. He was 62.  We were married almost 42 years.  I share your sadness and loneliness.  I too am grateful that at least he is no longer suffering.  I feel they will always be with us in spirit in our hearts and memories.  You & your family are in my thoughts and prayers along with all of the others that have been affected by this terrible disease.

Darla

"One Day At A Time"

All of my comments and suggestions are just my opinions and are not a substitute for professional medical advice.   You should always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care providers.

Re: missing my husband Tom, (Dad of 2 and granddad of 3: Didi)

Thanks Darla, You and I know each others feelings.  You were kind to respond.  Hope you are doing as well as can be expected.  It's good to share.  Yes, we are experiencing the loneliness, and yes you are right, they are always with us in spirit and in our hearts. I am sorry for your loss too. Marilyn

marilyn

Re: missing my husband Tom, (Dad of 2 and granddad of 3: Didi)

Hello marilyn,
   I am so sorry to hear about your loss. There are many of us on this board who have lost our loved ones, and we try to hold each othr up. I lost my husband on October 9, 2008 after a 7 month battle, and I still am havving a hard time believing he is gone some times. My Grandchildren also talk about Grandpa Butchie a lot - the 15 year old always says he was her hero.


Joyce C.

Re: missing my husband Tom, (Dad of 2 and granddad of 3: Didi)

Dear Marilyn
                     What a hard year this must have been for you.My husband,Joel died earlier this year at the same age.I was 7 years younger than him and so I have kids still at high school-or 1 kid-.It has been a bit of a reaching out sort of time using this medium which was newish to me.Joel died 3 months after diagnosis and it was his 1st illness ever.My sons and I are still struggling.This is overwhelming what has happened to us and you know we need to stick together                  kind regards    Janet

Re: missing my husband Tom, (Dad of 2 and granddad of 3: Didi)

Janet, yes it is overwhelming a lot of days.  My husband also was never sick before being diagnosed--exercised every day, played golf--but soon started to be fatiqued and started losing some weight--we were shocked to find out he had this.  It must be so hard for you with children still in school.  It helps to talk about it to others who are going through the same thing.  Fondly,  Marilyn

marilyn