1 (edited by Kate G Thu, 26 Apr 2007 05:28:27)

Topic: My Mum

My Mum died last Saturday, 21st April. She was only 68 years old.
I've always dreaded having to be adding to this section, and here I am.
Mum was diagnozed about 13 months ago. She had a liver resection in Greece last summer. This January, she was told that the cancer had come back, in her liver. She decided to return to UK, to be with family, and have access to palliative care.
She was supposed to return to Greece Monday 2nd April, we were hoping that she could scrape another month or 2 out there maybe. Instead, she went hospital on the day her flight was due to leave. 8 days later she was transferred to a hospice. 10 days after the move, she died.
I am feeling very sad, very flat.
The highlight of her last week was the arrival of my Brother from NZ. That was the last coherent, relatively normal conversation we had with her. That was 2 days before she died.
The cancer, the Docs think, went to her brain. Either that, or she suffered some strokes. It was without a doubt the saddest and most distressing week of my life, because she did suffer, mentally, and physically, inspite of everyone's best efforts.
I am relieved for her, and us, that she has moved on now.
My Brother and I feel honoured to have had such a fantastic Mum. We have NO bad memories of her at all. She has only ever supported and loved us as we are. Really, not one bad memory. What a tribute to a wonderful Mother. I will miss her for always.
Here is a nice link from one of her friends, from his website

http://www.thegallerykefalonia.com/diar … pril22.asp

Last Saturday, my husband reconnected up an old hard drive of mine. And on it, I found a video clip I took of her, when I was in Kefallonia in January. From being a tearful wreck, I sat and watched it and laughed! My Brother was hit by tears the following day, and when I showed him this film, he also laughed. It was our Mum! Her voice, her eccentric life, in a brief and grainy film. I'm uploading it to the net as I type, and will post a link if it works. THAT is how I will remember her!!

http://s13.photobucket.com/albums/a279/ … I_2814.flv

Cholangiocarcinoma, what a bummer.

Re: My Mum

Kate,
I am so sorry that you lost your mum. She sounded like a wonderful, fun loving person. I hope you will continue to be able to laugh along with your tears when thinking of her. It sounds like a healthy way to grieve. Just know we are all thinking of you and wishing you peace and comfort. God bless. Mary

Re: My Mum

Kate ,

I'm very very sorry for your loss . I do not know how to explain my feelings.
You were a great daughter that you supported your mum in the hard days especially in the hospital in Greece . I had really appreciated you at that time .

I wish you patience and peace .

Take care ,
Figen

Re: My Mum

Oh Kate, Kate, Kate, I'm so so sorry! I feel like I knew your mother, she lived such a wonderful life, and I just lOVE that clip of her in Greece! Especially since I'm such a big animal lover!  I, too, went through some recent video clips on my mother's birthday in February - we had a big party without her and watched her playing with my daughter, dancing, being her goofy self. We laughed and cried and felt like she was there with us. It's so wonderful to have those videos now, we never realized at the time how important they would be. What a great woman and mother, I'm so sorry that she had to suffer AT ALL.

It's not going to get better for a while - at least, it hasn't for me - but those memories and videos that make you laugh are precious medicine to help the pain. What a beautiful memorial to her. I hope you and your family are holding up as well as you can. Much love and hugs to you and yours.
- Joyce

Re: My Mum

kate sweetie, im so srry to hear bout ur sad loss hunni u av my email n my number im only a call away chin up keep smiling its wot ur mum wud av wanted love caz xxxx

Re: My Mum

Hi Kate.... My heart felt sympathy goes out to you and your family.    I want ya to know  how proud I  am of you for jumping in and taking the Bull by the horns.  You  advocated and supported your Mum temendously. I know it was rough, but I'm sure she was very happy that you did.  I watched the video clip and have to admit it made me chuckle.  Cherish the great memories kate ...it will lesson the sadness a bit.  Okay,I replayed the clip 3 times It just made me feel good.  I don't know what Simon Cowel would think of the vocals but I thought it so sweet and Idol.  God Bless ya girl ! You know your Mum is resting in peace now.

Jeff G.

Take it to the Limit,One More Time! (Eagles)

Re: My Mum

kate

I'm so very sorry to hear about your dear mum, what a blessing that you have the video for comfort and that you are able to remember your mum as she was.  This disease was such a small part of her life - hold dear the person she was to you.  I am thinking of you and so sorry for your loss.

With love
Jules

Re: My Mum

Kate

I am so sorry to read the sad news about your mother.  She sems to have been a fighter and, I imagine, a bit of a free spirit.  While this is obviously a devastating time for you and your family, I am sure you will have such fond memories of your mum and her influence on your lives, that will bring you joy and comfort in the future.

Recently, I was feeling a bit down and I received a lot of support from my friends on this site.  I am reminded of one thing you wrote to me and I now return it...BLESS

My thoughts are with you.

Kind regards

Ron

Re: My Mum

Oh, what lovely replies.
My Mums journey is over, and some of you are still living with this disease. You are all so kind and brave.
Thanks so much, I really don't know what I would have done without this board, it has helped me again and again over the last year.
I hope I will keep visiting here, as I feel as if I know some of you!
Take care too, all of you.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Re: My Mum

Oh Kate!  I have only just seen your post.

I am so sorry about your loss but  there is consolation in knowing that your mother was such a character and lived her life by her own values and beliefs. What courage to take off the Greece to live in a caravan and just be what she wanted to be.

Last week I read, 'Life is a period of luminosity between two long periods of darkess.' It seems that your mothers life was particularly luminous and her light shone on everyone around her.

My warmest regards to you and your family.

Patricia.

Re: My Mum

Thanks Patricia!
I am flying out to Greece tomorrow morning, with my kids, to stay in said caravan for a month! It's the best thing to do!
XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Re: My Mum

Kate what a marvellous idea.
I have read of your moms journey and looked at your video.
WHAT A FANTASTIC WOMAN.
I too had a house in a village not too long ago in cyprus and it was great.
Alan had a holiday there once with his partner and also loved it.
Isn't it great that we are left with these lovely memories that we can cling to and re-visit whenever we feel the need, and of course we sure do.
love and light alan's mom and dad

U.K.Member

Re: My Mum

Well, a month turned into nearly 2! I wasn't ready to leave when the end of June came, so we stayed on till 24th July! SO glad I did it, it really helped, living in Mum's little home, living the life she led for so long. The kids had a great time too, and I'm glad to say that I have no doubt that Granny's life will be indelibly stamped on their minds for the rest of their lives!
I still miss her, that goes without saying. But I am OK, and thankful that I was able to indulge my grief with the trip to Greece!
Much love to all who have lost loved ones in my absence.

Re: My Mum

hi kate hun, how u doing hun? first post in a while as ive been up n down emotionally, so hard to accept mums gone its so surreal, its her b day nxt mnth wud av been 53 it has got a little easier and u try n get on with life the best u can. anyways hope ur keeping well hun thought i wud just say hi xxxx