Topic: questions you wish you would have asked

My mom will be going back to docs after her dx this thursday( she opted to be told over the phone)
they are going to to go through her options. I was wondering if there were questions that you wish you would have asked in the beginning. I'm lost at this point since I didn't get to listen when they told her. thank you all. rrutherford6

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

Hello rrutherford6,

So sorry to hear about your Mom.

It is very difficult to know the questions to ask when we are confronted with a disease especially a cancer such as CC, rarely occurring, with very little research to rely on.

If you have the time to do so, try to read as much as possible on this site.  I realize it being time consuming, but it will give you a wealth of information, which in turn will give you the power of knowledge, which then will lead you to ask informed questions. 

Also, when consulting with any physician, my family would take along a Dictaphone. 
We asked the doctor

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

I am a new member and I was reading about your needing questions to ask the doctor, well I too am going to meet my father's doctor next Thursday and I was wondering the same thing that you were, so is there anything that you suggest?

I wish you all the best,

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

Question I wish and am going to ask . are my moms stents plastic or metal. she had the stents put in the same day they did brush scrapping to find out if she had cancer because mri's and cat showed no signs of any tumors. They were not sure why she was jaundice and itching. I also want to ask about the experimental drug I've read a little about here. can't think of the name right off hand but it's fda ok for late stage kidney cancer and they are experimenting for this. We go Thusday in the morning so I will definatly let you know what I learn from there to help you.

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

I would also suggest a cancer "buddy", someone who will be your second set of ears when that rushing sound comes in and you can't understand what they are saying.  They can also remind you of the questions you thought of asking and forgot about.  As they come up during the week, write them down!

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

Since my husband was diagnosed in March, we have asked to have a copy of all test results faxed to us - CT scans, MRI

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

I will do everything that was suggested. Thank you so much.. there is just so much racing of the mind it is so hard to stay focused on what is what..

Re: questions you wish you would have asked

If we had our time again, these are a few things we would have done/asked:

- Do not hesitate to ask each and every question that is playing on your mind - no matter how small or simple you might think that question is.

- Ask the tough questions.  The answers may be frightening, but somehow it is easier to cope if you know exactly what it is that you are confronting. 

- Don't let the doctors shirk the difficult questions, press them for honest answers.  Don't let the doctors put you off.  If the doctor says your loved one can't be seen for two weeks, and you're not satisfied with that, don't accept it - force the issue!

- In particular, ask questions about what you should be on the look out for and when you should bring your loved one in for medical attention.  We were flying somewhat blind during Mum's illness and didn't have sufficient information to distinguish between symptoms that were part of the progression of her cancer and other symptoms that indicated something else entirely was happening (Mum developed a blood clot, and we had no idea that this was a risk or the symptoms to be on the look out for)

- If while caring for your loved one you sense something is going wrong, trust your instincts.  If you feel that your loved one needs medical attention, do not hesitate to seek the help you need.

Hope that helps - my best wishes are with you.