Topic: my dad
My Dad is now getting very weak, his appetite is very poor and he is mostly sleeping. In the last few days he has become confused. My heart is breaking. Since my Dad's diagnosis in July 2005 I have visited this site regulary, more recently I have felt utter despair and extreme sadness to read the heart wrenching testimonies from cc sufferers and family members on the blogs and the discussion board. I feel extreme anger that this devastating cancer is overlooked by cancer research scientists - I have seen little progress in treatments available since I began researching into this disease just over 2 years ago. The creators of this website and the foundation have worked tirelessly to raise awareness of this disease and to provide an arena for sufferers to get emotional support despite having suffered the loss of Mark - Stacie, Rick and all those assisting in the Foundation, thankyou.
This may sound like a farewell speech, maybe it is - I don't know if I have the emotional strength to keep checking the board, right now I feel overwhelming utter despair and extreme sadness. I have endured over 2 years of anxiety, fear and pain watching my dear Dad fight for his life. My Dad has been so brave, we have shared a mixture of extreme highs or lows. Life was never the same after diagnosis.
I am thankful that we found Dr Nesslehut in Germany, since my Dad's recurrance in April of last year, I believe that Dr Nesslehut gave us more time, more quality time, free from harsh side effects. Only a couple of weeks ago my dad has a ct scan which again, showed stable disease. My Dad's current weak state is due, I believe, from extreme weight loss (cachexia). Having read up on this condition there appears to be no effective treatment available. the confusion is due to a combination of low hb and raised urea level in the body (as my dad becomes weaker he is not taking in enough fluids). Today my Dad is due to go into hospital (as a day patient, I wouldn't want him to spend another night in an NHS hospital) for a blood transfusion, please be thinking of us today, hoping that my Dad might regain some strength. I will never give up hoping that I can turn this thing around.