Topic: I am losing my mind

This is the worse year in my life. My husband John is dying from BDC, His one brother Pete has emphasyma and his Dr. thinks he's got colon cancer, His other brother just told everyone he's getting divorced, my sister in-law has been feeling sick, went to the Dr. and found out her liver enzymes are high.
I can not take any more. I just want to run away and hide. My life is ending. Everyone in my family is ill, and I'm having to work to keep us going and have insurance for Johns cancer treatments, and trying to take care of Johns Mom who is 87
I'ts too hard, I feel like God is grinding me into a pulp. I'ts just too hard.
Charlene

Re: I am losing my mind

I am so sorry to hear that your family is not doing well. I am sure you do not need the added stress or worry. But Fairydrop, you are doing great. You have a lot going on and anyone would feel overwhelmed. It is ok to have these feelings. I am sure everyone is looking at you with bucket loads of appreciation and awe that you are doing everything you are, taking care of everyone else, and still managing to function. You have a hard road ahead, but you can do it and we are here to help...even if it is just letting you get things off your chest.

Is there any possibility that one of your husbands family members can look after your mother in law? It sounds like his family is all facing some sort of problem, but there might be someone...even a grandchild who can maybe only do it a couple of weeks, but just something so you can have a little break?

Things are changing around you. And I am sure you are scared, lonely, and overwhelmed. But you are strong. It might not feel that way now, but it is that way. Life rarely gives us more than we can handle. You never know how much you can do or how strong you are until life pushes you to find out. Unfortunately you are now being pushed. But you are doing fine, far better than most people given your circumstances.

I hope things settle down for you. And go nudge your husband and tell him that I said you need a hug and his would be the best. I am bossy and that is an order. Take care.

Kris

Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

36 year old patient with buckets of hope

Re: I am losing my mind

Your letter brought tears and a sense of understanding that I really needed. I am feeling totally alone and lost. There are just too many things happening all at once and I am feeling very overwhelmed.
I appreciate you all being here. You are the only ones who truely understand what we are going through.
I can't thank you enough. When i was writing my letter I was having a severe anxiety attack. I felt as though i was on the verge of a mental breakdown, but since reading your reply I feel a bit better, not so frantic.
Thank you again,
Charlene

Re: I am losing my mind

Dear Charlene,
I could never say it as well and as eloquently as Kris just did - so please know that she speaks for all of us! You have the strength of a thousand people just to have gotten this far, having gone through all this hardship. You are very brave and you deserve to have a good cry and a little time to just think of yourself for a change.

You will get through this - let us know if we can help you in any way.

-Joyce