• kimmie
  • kimmie
  • Senior Member
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  • From: Maryland
  • Registered: Sun, 09 Aug 2009
  • Posts: 110

Topic: My poor husband

It was 6 weeks ago today that my dear mother died.  It's been a rough last couple of weeks.  I was almost annoyed that my husband didn't seem overly supportive or patient with me, as I tried to gently explain to him on a number of occasions why I'm so moody and what grief is doing to me right now.

Come to find out, he's been dealing with a worry but didn't want to burden me with more.  He's been having pressure/pain/discomfort for a few months just under his rib cage, sometimes right side and sometimes left.  Without me knowing, he's been to his GP, sent for abdominal ultrasound week before last, and bloodwork last week.  They're fairly certain it's fatty liver, and the sonogram showed multiple cysts.  (He's at an ideal weight, exercizes regularly, no diabetes, eats a great diet low in fat, etc., but he has genetically very high cholesterol.) 

He finally told me Friday night.  He's been so worried about it, including worry that something was very wrong with his liver, especially after losing his beloved mother-in-law to CC.  It got to the point where he's had a couple of panic attacks, sick with the thought of being very ill with a young family.

It just breaks my heart.  I understand why he didn't want to tell me - I'd be the same exact way if he'd just lost his mother.  I just wish I could've been more support for him.  Well, I know now and I'm here to support him.

From what I've read, fatty liver isn't uncommon and can often be left untreated, just modification of diet, more exercise, stuff like that.  All things he already does.  So I'm anxious to hear what his GP recommends next.

I'm not sure why I posted this here - it's just that you all are so supportive, know what I'm going through in my grief, and can probably relate to the feelings I'm having.  Keep my hubby in your prayers!

~Kim
my mother lost her 16 month battle with CC 9/26/10
"Mothers have as powerful an influence over the welfare of future generations as all other earthly causes combined."

kimmie's Website

  • From: Kalmar, Sweden
  • Registered: Sun, 20 May 2007
  • Posts: 1,951

Re: My poor husband

Kim,
Your poor husband. He really just loves you so much that he only wants to be a rock for you, not another worry. Silly man. After 4 years of dealing with my cc, Hans still will try to hide things from me that might make me worry. You cant help but love them more for that (though the truth does eventually always come out).

I dont know anything about fatty liver, but lets hope it is as you said...just a change in diet and activity. Hugs to you and your husband and hope all goes well.

Kris

Cancer is a word, not a sentence.

36 year old patient with buckets of hope
  • From: Manchester,England
  • Registered: Mon, 03 Aug 2009
  • Posts: 328

Re: My poor husband

Wow Kimmie,

Your poor hubby, keeping all this to himself was his way I guess to protect you and he was probably thinking if it was 'nothing' he may never have to worry you.....

I know right now your thoughts are probably with the worst case scenario after everything you have just dealt with with your Mum. Just to let you know I am thinking of you and your husband at this time. Fingers crossed for him.

Katie

  • Lainy
  • Lainy
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  • From: Phoenix AZ
  • Registered: Fri, 13 Jan 2006
  • Posts: 8,218

Re: My poor husband

Ah Kimmie, what a sweet "love" story. Now you can give the love of your life your upmost attention. Poor baby and I am sure it took a lot for him to do that.
My BFF has the same thing, for years now. All they do is check it periodically for her. I know she is prone to very high cholestrol. Hope everything swims along now for your family!

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.
  • Registered: Fri, 12 May 2006
  • Posts: 8,174

Re: My poor husband

Kimmie.....I agree with what the others have said.  I know of several  people diagnosed with fatty liver in fact, my Mom has and, she is 83 years old. 
But I have to admit that this disease has also left an imprint on the minds of many including,  me and that coupled with some degree of fear that this disease may be silently lurking in someone else. 
I suppose this happens to be a side effect in a different sort of way in that it affects all people touched by this disease.  Your husband's concern for your emotional wellbeing is that of love and caring.  Thanks for sharing this touching story and kudos to you both of you..
Hugs
Marion

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER
  • From: Cape Town, South Africa
  • Registered: Mon, 09 Mar 2009
  • Posts: 155

Re: My poor husband

Hi Kimmie

Your dear husband, he loves you so much.  Be kind to yourself and take care of each other.  I am a great liver detoxer believer - every morning i juice beetroot, carrots, green apples, ginger and lemon. I can understand the fear of anything to do with liver, it completely freaks me out!

But i have heard of lots of people who lead normal lives with a 'fatty liver'.

lots of love

Michelle

"My dad, Tony, passed away on 4 October 2010, after a 19 month battle with CC"   - I carry you in my heart, Dad, forever.
  • Registered: Fri, 12 May 2006
  • Posts: 8,174

Re: My poor husband

Ever so often it might be helpful to re-post the Caregiver's Bill of Right.  I thought this to be one of those occasions:
Support for caregivers


I have the right to take care of myself.  This is not an act of selfishness.  It will give me the ability to take better care of my loved one.

I have the right to seek help from others even though my loved one may object.  I know the limits of my endurance and strength.

I have the right to maintain parts of my own life that do not include the person I care for just as he/she was healthy.  I know that I do everything that I reasonably can do for this person.  I have he right to do some things for myself.

I have the right to reject any attempt by my loved one to make me do things out of guilt or anger.  (It doesn

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER