• kimmie
  • kimmie
  • Senior Member
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  • From: Maryland
  • Registered: Sun, 09 Aug 2009
  • Posts: 110

Topic: This made me sad

I called my father today to see if he wanted to spend the day together tomorrow.  He's in the mid-stages of dementia, and it's his 70th birthday, so I thought it'd be fun for us to hang out, go to lunch, etc.  Anyway, when I called his answering machine picked up.  The answering machine that used to have my mother's voice on it.  Well, he got new cordless phones and I guess when he unplugged the answering machine, it defaulted back to the generic message that comes on the machine.  I'm so sad that my Mom's voice isn't on there anymore!!!!

~Kim
my mother lost her 16 month battle with CC 9/26/10
"Mothers have as powerful an influence over the welfare of future generations as all other earthly causes combined."

kimmie's Website

  • Lainy
  • Lainy
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  • From: Phoenix AZ
  • Registered: Fri, 13 Jan 2006
  • Posts: 8,313

Re: This made me sad

So sorry Kimmie. But that brings up an interesting dilema. My message machine has my voice and Teddy's saying, "This is Lainy...This is Teddy, leave a message when you're ready!".  My question is do people get offended?

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.
  • Registered: Fri, 12 May 2006
  • Posts: 8,312

Re: This made me sad

I think that this will lead to some great discussions.  This is what I believe....will it bother some people - most likeley it will. Will it bother others....most likely not.  Personally, I love hearing my husband's voice and others have adapted to it.  Hearing his voice can make me sad or it can make me happy.  As time has gone on though, I find comfort when hearing  his voice.  I leave my options open however, for the present (it has been four years, so far) the recording will stay.
How do others feel about this?
Marion

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER
  • Pam
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  • Registered: Fri, 11 Jun 2010
  • Posts: 292

Re: This made me sad

We lost my dad in November.  He has a funny phone recording on his cell that says he doesn't know where is phone is at and for that matter he doesn't know where he is at but leave a message and he will call back and get it all sorted out.  We want to record this before we disconnect his cell phone.  Sometimes I can call his phone and play it sometimes it is too sad.  I believe it is fine to continue to use a recording as long as you are comfortable with it.  I have heard it is also good for home security to have a male voice on your answering machine.

  • From: Wisconsin
  • Registered: Sun, 07 Sep 2008
  • Posts: 1,996

Re: This made me sad

Lainy,

I agree with Marion and Pam.  If you are comfortable leaving it on and it brings you comfort  then that's all that matters.  And yes, it is also a good idea from a security stand point.

Darla

"One Day At A Time"
  • From: New Bern, North Carolina
  • Registered: Tue, 30 Sep 2008
  • Posts: 683

Re: This made me sad

One of my biggest regrets is not having my Mom's voice recorded.  It was on her office phone for the longest time and I would call it at night just to hear her voice.  I would give anything to have a recording of her.....

Pam

My Mom lost her one year battle with CC on April 3, 2009.

"A prognosis is simply an audit of how truly precious each day is.  Live each day to the maximum, celebrate what was, and what is - Don't spend your life looking forward to what will or might be." .... words of wisdom from my beloved son on hearing of his grandmother's CC prognosis.
  • From: Mooresville Indiana
  • Registered: Wed, 20 Jun 2007
  • Posts: 202

Re: This made me sad

Kim, I am so sorry :-((. I remember when I disconnected Mom's cell phone and her voice was gone, I was so sad! That was the point that it seemed so final. I am so sorry :-((.
Lainy, If I were you, I would cherish your message forever and ever!!!
Love, Amy

  • Registered: Sat, 09 Dec 2006
  • Posts: 514

Re: This made me sad

Dear Kim,
I understand completely, and I agree with Marion that for some people the voice of your loved one will always be cherished, and while it may bring pain, it brings remembrance and love.

The 4 year anniversary of my mother's death is almost here, and I sometimes watch the videos my dear friend made of her daily interactions with my daughter. At the time we didn't know how precious those videos would be -- he was mainly just filming my daughter as she grew up. She was 4 (now 8) when Grandma Fifi died and she still won't watch the videos because she is still deeply upset by her favorite person's disappearance. And though I cry every time I watch those videos, it also makes me happy because it's all I have left of my mom and I can experience her goofy humor and crazy expressions and dancing all over again.

Peace to you - and I hope you find some consolation in the memories.

Joyce M

  • Registered: Sun, 14 Nov 2010
  • Posts: 295

Re: This made me sad

I'm going to be honest.  I would probably not leave it on my phone.  I would attempt to make a recording that I could keep, but I think it could make others uncomfortable -- at least after a bit of time.  However, you can't always go by me.  I am not one to surround myself with things that make me too melancholy and I think that is what would happen.  But -- this is just my opinion -- I also believe in doing whatever works for you!

Mother of John who lost his battle on Oct. 9, 2009 at age 30....