Topic: My Father, and My Best Friend

My Father passed away at 1303hrs on Oct 22nd.  I have not had the courage to post for a while and during his last month in the hospital, I stayed by his side and his condition just went downhill.  He was diagnosed in June of 06 followed by partial segmentectomy of liver 4/8, clear margins.  At that time was so positive until October when three new "spots" appeared which were treated with RFA, then recurrence in February of this year.  He was on three regimens of chemo, 1st FOLFOX, 2nd Gemzar/Erbitux (C225), then Gemzar/Avastin.  CA19-9 continued to climb and I believe the cancer was somewhat controlled by the Chemo but never killed.  He had a nasty reaction to Avastin, and stopped by the 3rd time which sent him into emergency on Sept 15.

My heart is broken as I sit here and write, and it is truly a horrible disease.  Towards the end of his life, he maintained maximum dignity and did the best he could to fight the cancer.  He fell into coma about one week before his death, the swollen ankles / bloated stomach were treated and Ascites were drained with "pig-tail."  The morning of his death Doctors were able to drop his Ammonia levels via Diruetics / Syrup (diaherra) and thus he opened his eyes in the morning and we were able to say good bye.  He took his last breath in peaceful sleep as his BP / SP02 / HR dropped at 1250. 

I still cannot believe that he is gone and can only say that he has gone to a better place with no more suffering from endless injections (my dad hates injections).  He went in peace and did not have any morphine or any pain.  The Doctors truly did the best they could and I am heartbroken that I could not have done more to control this horrible disease.  I feel like there are many things that my father still had to do, like go on more family vacations, spend more time with his granddaughter, play more golf, or even meet his future grandchildren, but all this has come to an end now.  He has returned to heaven and I can only say that while sad, he is now in eternal peace.  I know that I one day will join him and be re-united with him, but right now just feel so empty.  My father was only 61.

I dedicate this message to a man that was not only my father, but a role model and my best friend.  I will truly cherish my memories together with my father, and remember his as a perfect role model, hard working, totally honest, and incredibly fair all this coupled with a sense of humour.  I am honored to be his son, and I know that he was a true soldier and fighter and even through the difficult times and suffering through his sickess, he maintained maximum dignity.  I will truly miss him and can only wish him all the best in heaven, and look forward to the day that I will be re-united with him forever.  Dad, go in peace and please watch over us and give us the support like you always have, and God bless.  Miss you so much.

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Jliu168....I'm so sorry for your  lost.  I'm happy that he awoke from his coma and was able to say goodbye.  Like you said he can peacefully rest in Heaven now.  May God give you the strength to lighten your heavy heart.  Until the time comes for that great reunion may you have peace of mind that your Dad is okay now.
God Bless,
Jeff G.

Take it to the Limit,One More Time! (Eagles)

3 (edited by marions Mon, 29 Oct 2007 11:24:45)

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Dear Jliu168,...   My heart goes out to you as you had to join us, the ones left behind by those we loved so much.
Those cherished memories you have mentioned will sustain us forever as they truly become our treasures.
What a wonderful tribute to a wonderful Dad. 
Hoping for your heart to begin to heal ...one day at a time.....
Marions

THIS INFORMATION IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL MEDICAL ADVICE. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS SEEK THE ADVICE OF YOUR PHYSICIAN OR OTHER QUALIFIED HEALTH CARE PROVIDER

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Dear Jliu,
I am so sorry your father lost his valiant battle with this disease. All my sympathy and best wishes go out to you. Another wonderful person is taken.
I wish you peace,
Joyce

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Jliu168,

My thoughts and deepest sympathy go out to you and your family. Your Dad was a lucky man to have such a loving and caring Son. Take great pride in the fact that you were there for him through it all, I am certain you made him very proud.

Lisa

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Jliu168,

I am so sorry for the loss of your dear father and for the pain and anguish that you must be feeling right now.  I hope that in time you are able to take comfort from the fact that you were there with him during those dark days and that must have meant so much to him, I am sure that he felt loved and cherished beyond words.

I feel for you so much as I know only too well how it feels to lose such a special father in this way, my heart goes out to you and your family at this immensly difficult time.

Jules

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Dear All Members,

Many thanks to all of you for your kind messages and support during this most difficult time.  I had my father cremated yesterday, and it was one of the most difficult moments in life seeing him being cremated.  On the other hand, I know that his soul is already in heaven and that by cremating him, I have gotten rid of those dirty rotten cancer cells and now he is finally cancer free.

It is an ugly cancer and I hope that research and forums like this help familes and patients be more aware and have more answers for this horrible disease.  This website has proved to be most useful and many members really gave myself more understanding of the disease and what to expect.

I hope that all of you maintain positive and all the best!

Thanks again and God Bless.

Re: My Father, and My Best Friend

Dear Jliu 168 -
So very sorry about your Dad.   He sounded like such a wonderful person; your description of him in the last paragraph was beautiful.  You will miss him but were so blessed to have had a role model like him in your life.  I'm sure he was a proud Dad.
Betty Johnson