• From: Alabama
  • Registered: Thu, 15 Dec 2011
  • Posts: 365

Topic: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

Has got to be one of the hardest things I have been through.

Liza is only 24. She has Fibrolamellar Hepatocellular Carcinoma. She learned of her cancer 8 months before me. We were friends before cancer, and worked for the same local bank.

She is hanging in there, but it looks like she doesn't have much longer at all. My heart hurts. And it makes me sad for my family too. Because I see how much her family is hurting, and I know mine will feel the same.

I'm looking for any advice or words of wisdom on how to get through this, and keep my spirits up.

~Tiffany~ 31 years young wink Fighting CC since 10-27-2011
Wife to Brian; Mommy to Carter (7) and Madison (4)
http://tiffanyschwantes.wordpress.com/
I balance my life with my breath.

tiff1496's Website

  • From: Phoenix AZ
  • Registered: Fri, 13 Jan 2006
  • Posts: 8,200

Re: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

Tiff, take one situation at a time. I don't know how to stop one from 'thinking' about what is to come, sure wish I did. Just take one day at a time is the best I can say. I believe that family comes through with strength when they need too and I believe that just getting to know you through this site, if and when that time would come you will prepare your children well. When God solves my problems I have faith in his abilities, when he doesn't solve my problems he has faith in my abilities!

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.

3 Reply by Pamela (edited by Pamela Tue, 15 May 2012 22:34:36)

  • From: Uniontown, Ohio
  • Registered: Fri, 23 Sep 2011
  • Posts: 1,487

Re: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

Tiff,

I would just focus on being the best Mommy you can be and make great memories for your children.  I know it is so hard to see Liza so sick. It hurts all of our hearts, but yours especially since you know her well. Like Lainy says, take one day at a time and be happy for each day. Love you girl and watch for that mail truck tomorrow.
Something should be coming!!

Love, -Pam

Hoping for a miracle for my daughter, Lauren.

My comments, suggestions, and opinions are based on my experience as a caretaker for my daughter, Lauren and from reading anything I can get my hands on about Cholangiocarcinoma. Please consult a physician for professional guidance.

Pamela's Website

  • From: Revelstoke BC
  • Registered: Sat, 01 Jan 2011
  • Posts: 552

Re: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

Hi Tiff,  Boy, another rare cancer I have never heard of. I have had many losses in my life and what gets me by is knowing we will all be there one day. I believe death is not an end but a new beginning. I like to believe wherever my husband is now he is saying " Wow, this is great! Wait till you get here!"
Life can be so cruel sometimes, but one has to rejoice in living here and now, for no one nows how long they have.
My heart goes out to your friend and her family.
Are you going on your trip soon? That should help to lift your spirits! Hugs to you and your family. Take care. Nancy

Loving my husband from afar.
  • From: Revelstoke BC
  • Registered: Sat, 01 Jan 2011
  • Posts: 552

Re: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

I read daily passages in a book called "Healing After Loss" by Martha Whitmore Hickman.  Today's passage contained a quote from Terry Kay, "I will miss seeing her face and hearing her voice and knowing she was always there close to me. She has crossed a river from me that I must wait to cross before I see her again. When I see a river I will think of her."  I found this very fitting to what I was saying above. I like the analogy of crossing a river and knowing that one day we too will cross the river and be reunited with those we love. Hugs. Nancy

Loving my husband from afar.
  • From: Phoenix AZ
  • Registered: Fri, 13 Jan 2006
  • Posts: 8,200

Re: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

Nancy, this is beautiful! Thank you.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.
  • From: Alabama
  • Registered: Thu, 15 Dec 2011
  • Posts: 365

Re: Watching a friend die of cancer...when you have cancer

Thank you so much everyone! I went to see my friend in the hospital yesterday, and I'm glad I did. God bless her.

~Tiffany~ 31 years young wink Fighting CC since 10-27-2011
Wife to Brian; Mommy to Carter (7) and Madison (4)
http://tiffanyschwantes.wordpress.com/
I balance my life with my breath.

tiff1496's Website