Thank you, Lainy and mm. I’m of the “I don’t know but I’ll try to keep an open mind” school and I’m really trying to keep an open mind over this.
I’ve been making “Memorial Cards” for Sue over the past few days. We were given one when our Aunt died last year and Sue said “I want one of those”, so one-of-those was what I was determined she should have. Mum chose the photo and I designed and made the cards.
Yesterday, I printed, signed and sealed the first batch, for delivery this morning to the friends in the two streets my house adjoins.
Last night was the first night I’ve dreamed about Sue since she died (or, at the least, the first time I remember dreaming about her). In my dream, she was really keen to come with me as I delivered the cards. I felt rather weird at first, delivering memorial cards for my late sister, when my “late” sister insisted on accompanying me – but I got used to it after a while. My friends didn’t seem to find it as odd as I did and we had a great time.
At one point, I remember she was sitting on a friend’s sofa and her limbs kept fading in and out, as if she was about to disappear, but she forced them back into view. At one point, she snapped at me; “stop watching me like that – I’m not going anywhere”, which friends who know Sue – either personally or through my posts – will know was something she said to me quite often in the latter stages of her illness.
When I awoke this morning, I delivered the cards on my own, but I know Sue was with me and I know she approved. In fact I think she’s chuffed to bits.*
*Chuffed to bits = really pleased about something (http://www.effingpot.com/slang.shtml)
“When it is dark enough, you can see the stars." - Ralph Waldo Emerson