Topic: anyone exerence personality changes long before diagnosis?
My husband Rick seemed to change emotionally , as near as I can figure, around 2005. It seemed to come on gradually, he was disconnecting and very distant. I blamed it on the possiblity of male menopause, mid life crisis, whatever. We had been married 22 years by then, and i thot I knew him well. But he as emotionally void. I cant really explain it. Finally we went to counseling, and again, non participant. I tried to be close with him but he just was not "there". I felt very threatened but just did not know why. Then he started to age fast, and get tired alot etc. I knew something was wrong and he did get a physical and passed. (How they palpated his abdomen and missed a 15 cm tumor I just dont know, I could feel it myself) He died the first of this year, and I never saw the old Rick again. I wanted to cherish our remaining time but he seemed unable to ...feel, for the lack of a better word. I wonder if anyone else has gone thru anything like this. I feel like I lost my husband long before I actually experienced his death. I do believe it was the cancer, I found no evidence of anything else. The timing was right, but I am still confused about it. So I focus on thought of the normal Rick who was a bunch of fun almost my whole married life. But the last few years I was married to a stranger.