• From: New Delhi, India
  • Registered: Tue, 13 Nov 2012
  • Posts: 3

Topic: Grieving Daughter!

My mother was diagnosed with CCA in January and since then life has become a nightmarish rollercoaster. After an initial phase of bleak diagnosis, her tumor was successfully removed in University of Pittsburgh Medical Centre and she underwent 12 rounds of chemo, during which her PET scans showed a steady decline in the disease.

Tha last PET SCAN in August was almost clear. However, two months down the lane, the latest PET Scan in November and our game is over. The disease has come back with a vengeance and she has very few treatment options. The doctors have given her only about 6 months and our family is devastated. She is the core of everything that we do and we do not know how we will survive this.

She is going to begin chemo again with intake of the biological medicine Tarceva, bt docs have very little hope. I want to share this here, because everyone here understands. I do not want to talk about this to even my closest friends and I have to keep a brave face in front of my dad, who has taken this very hard.

  • From: Phoenix AZ
  • Registered: Fri, 13 Jan 2006
  • Posts: 8,215

Re: Grieving Daughter!

Dearest shraddhs, I am so very sorry about your Mother. It is terrible when you think one is going to be OK and the monster rears it's ugly head again. The only thing I can say to you is, the stronger you all become the better to get through this nightmare. I am thinking if your mother is the core of everything she must be a very strong woman and you all could show her that she taught you well by being the ones now for her to rest her strength on. When my husband had his CC we talked and talked to family and friends and to each other as it was a way to help us accept. It may be hard at first but for us it worked. My heart is with your whole family and please keep us posted on how she is doing as we truly care.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.
  • From: Uniontown, Ohio
  • Registered: Fri, 23 Sep 2011
  • Posts: 1,488

Re: Grieving Daughter!

Dear shraddhs,

I am very sorry to hear about your Mom after going through the resection and all. Try to enjoy the time you spend with her. I try not to think about the day my daughter might not be here with us. It is just too painful and it does nothing but bring me down. You have to reach deep down and find your strength. I always thought bad things would never happen to our family because I was just too weak to deal with it. I have since learned that I am very strong because that is my only acceptable option. My daughter needs me to be strong for her. Your Mom needs you and your family to be strong for her. I know it is so difficult. Please come back and let us know how things are going. We are all here to help.

Love and hugs,
-Pam

Hoping for a miracle for my daughter, Lauren.

My comments, suggestions, and opinions are based on my experience as a caretaker for my daughter, Lauren and from reading anything I can get my hands on about Cholangiocarcinoma. Please consult a physician for professional guidance.

Pamela's Website

  • Gavin
  • Gavin
  • Moderator
  • Offline
  • From: Scotland - Dundee
  • Registered: Tue, 23 Sep 2008
  • Posts: 4,832

Re: Grieving Daughter!

Dear Shraddhs,

Welcome to the site, although I am so sorry to hear what your mum is going through right now. And I know that hearing news like you have heard will have hit all of your family so very hard. I can so relate to how your dad is feeling and it will have hit him hard. My mum felt the same way after we got similar news about my dads diagnosis.

For me, it helped to talk to others who understood what I was going through and I feel that it might help you as well. Please keep coming back here and talk, shout and scream as much as you want to. We so understand how you feel and what you are going through right now. Like Lainy did with her family, we talked about my dads CC and that helped us all get through it. I know you say that you don't want to talk to even your closest friends about this, but I am sure that even though they might not understand how you feel they will still be there for you.

We have someone here who might be of use and help to you, Dr Giles. He is a licensed psychologist and has helped many of our members with everything to do with CC. He can't answer specific medical questions for you but he might be of use to you should you have some questions for him about dealing with everything and how you feel etc. Should you wish to contact him with a question he can be found here -

http://www.cholangiocarcinoma.org/ask.htm

Please know that we are all here for you. Keep coming back and let us know how things go for you and your mum. You are not alone in this now, we are here with you and we care.

My best wishes to you and your mum,

Gavin

  • Rena
  • Member
  • Offline
  • From: Madison, WI
  • Registered: Thu, 08 Nov 2012
  • Posts: 37

Re: Grieving Daughter!

Dear Shraddhs,

I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing this horrible disease with your parent too.  It is very hard and such an emotional roller coaster.  At first, I didn't want to discuss it anyone either because as soon as I would begin, I would begin to cry.  I actually ran out of tears the week my dad got his diagnosis.  However, my good friends saw my pain and encouraged me to talk about it with them.  It feels better now to share dad's updates with them because I know they truly do care!  I hope too to find strength here to be able to deal with what's ahead.
Take care and try to stay strong! 

Rena

  • From: New Delhi, India
  • Registered: Tue, 13 Nov 2012
  • Posts: 3

Re: Grieving Daughter!

Dear all,

Thanks so much for all your support and taking the time to respond to me. I am trying my best to be strong as my mom can read my face and understand my state of mind. I have been very lucky, I have these wonderful memories with her and a great great bond. Also, I am not giving up hope for miracles. After all, miracles do happen. Reading some stories and posts on this forum gives me hope, courage and optimism. Keeping my fingers crossed, plss pray for my mother

  • From: Phoenix AZ
  • Registered: Fri, 13 Jan 2006
  • Posts: 8,215

Re: Grieving Daughter!

Dear shraddhs, good girl and you are a good daughter! That's what we do best here, we pray, HOPE and support each other. Funny thing about a Mom's intuition but we do read our children's faces, no matter their age. Miracles, we have some Miracles right on this Board. When my husband went in for his Whipple Surgery, my son said he was amazed that he could feel all the prayers in the Hospital Room, he said he never had a feeling like that ever before. Please keep us updated on your Mother and you ARE receiving a ton of prayers.

Teddy ~In our hearts forever~ATTITUDE is EVERYTHING
Any suggestion I offer is intended as friendly advice based solely on my own experience. Please consult your doctor for professional guidance.