I checked out you Caringbridge blog and found we have another connection of sorts. Your Al passed away on what would have been out 46th anniversary.
I read through some of your posts and think you are doing well under the circumstances. Much of what you are expressing I have and in some cases still am dealing with too. Back when Jim passed I didn't know about Caringbridge but kept a daily journal.
You truly are a strong person and I know you will be OK. Keep taking it one day at a time. Maybe even one moment at a time when necessary.