I approached my wife, tentatively, asking is there anything you want to do or see, she no, I just want my grandkids here as much as I can handle, and we did. My wife was a worrier, as is my father. I think seeing the stress my dad put on himself, for no reason, led me to not look for things to worry about. Now when my wife, Cindy was diagnosed Feb 2011, I know she worried but never showed it. We made onc appts and chemo days, date days, we'd pick out something to see and a new place to eat and go out on a date after her appt. A few times when she was having radiology on her neck, her mouth got so bad she couldn't eat, but she wanted to go and order the meal, she'd pick at it and say now you have dinner tomorrow. Even though I'd been married to her 38 yrs, it absolutely reminded me of why I loved her so much. She didn't want people around her crying and feeling sorry for her. She wanted her family, and to live life as much, with them, as possible. She told me one day, "I have decided to not worry about what I can't control". From that point on, her advice to anyone who would listen was, "don't sweat the small stuff". I try to love by her advice today, mostly because I lived though the big stuff with her. God's grace to all.