Topic: Crap day
Yesterday was a crap-bad day. I did end up having the port installed her locally instead of going back to Mayo. That was probably a good decision because once the operative medication wore off, it hurt like heck to swallow, to turn my neck or raise my arm even a little. I slept most of the rest of the afternoon until about 8 p.m.. When I got up to take meds and insulin shot after having a late dinner, it all just came crashing down on me and I burst into tears. I'm sick of incisions that aren't healed. I'm sick of the procedures and doctor visits. I'm sick of this port already. I'm sick of the survival odds for this cancer. I'm sick of the idea of doing chemo that isn't guaranteed to work against something that may or may not be there. I'm sick of this cancer....period! ( Yeah...I know...aren't we all?) Today may be a better day....still to be determined, but for yesterday, I'm glad it's over. I don't want to feel like that again. I'm having 3 year old grandson "therapy" today. If he doesn't cheer me up...nothing will.